What If
by KilgharrahPendragon
Summary: What if Fate decided that too many people had interfered with Merlin's destiny and gave him a chance to change the fate of Albion? Merlin takes the most unlikely choice and instead of leading to a year of fear, pain and misery he finds love, hope and trust in the most unlikely source. M for sexual content. Canon Merlin/Mordred; Merlin/Arthur
1. Chapter 1

**AN So this is a random fic that I have no idea where it's going at this starting point but hopefully it will go somewhere awesome. All I know is that I definitely want to explore the idea of altering season 5 of the show. So hopefully you don't mind as I move through the season, possibly slowly or possibly quickly, no idea but here we go!**

**Pairings: Merlin/Mordred, Merlin/Arthur**

Intro:

"I offer you a choice," Said the tall cloaked figure before Merlin. He had no idea where he was but wherever it was, it was bright. All around him a white light seemed to radiate, blocking out any identifying features of his surroundings and of the man in front of him. Merlin knelt on the ground, his slain king in his lap and he tried to wipe away his tears but only smeared Arthur's blood across his cheeks instead. "Before you stand two doors, each allowing you a chance to go back and change the fate of Albion." He continued and Merlin felt the flutter of hope in his stomach but he didn't dare trust it. Everything was ending, Arthur was dead, Albion lost and it was all Merlin's fault. He couldn't stop the tears that spilled over his cheeks as he helplessly tried to regain some semblance of control over himself.

"What are you talking about? How can I do that?" He asked, looking back up at the cloaked figure.

"Destiny has played you a cruel hand but fate has stepped in to give you another chance." He said cryptically, "if you choose this door," He paused indicating the door to his right, "You will return to Camelot, one year ago from today with all the knowledge you have now. You remember the battle of Camlann, you will remember what causes Mordred to betray Arthur and you will have the opportunity to alter the events that brought you here.

The other door, should you not choose the other, you will return one year from today but you will have no memory of these events nor will you have ever been warned against Mordred. You will know nothing in the role he plays in Arthur's death-"

"How could that possibly be good?" Merlin shouted and the creature before him tilted his head, looking at him curiously.

"Prophesy, young Emrys, can be more dangerous than any other magic. If you had not known Mordred would one day betray Arthur, would you have ever doubted him? What reason would you have to distrust him?" He challenged and Merlin realized the truth of his words. He remembered that day when Mordred lay dying and the Disir gave Arthur the opportunity to accept the Old Religion and how in his misguided belief that Mordred had to die, he had unwittingly sealed the fate of Camelot. Would he have acted differently if he had not been set on Mordred's death? He knew the answer instantly and he looked up again at the being before him.

"I have decided." His voice was filled with a confidence that he didn't feel.

"Are you sure Emrys? You will not be granted this chance again."

"I'm sure." He nodded; he would not make the same mistakes twice. He would do the right thing; he would save Arthur and Camelot and maybe some others along the way.

Chapter One

_Emrys_ Came the gentle voice, whispering in the wind and Merlin looked around the golden woods. Sunlight cascaded through amber leaves, shadows danced as the wind tousled the branches and the word seemed to brush against his skin. He smiled at the familiarity, at its warmth as he began walking, his feet wading through the fallen leaves, creating a loud rustling sound. He wasn't sure exactly where he was going, but he felt a pull towards the crest of the hill that he could just barely make out between the trees up ahead.

_Emrys_ the voice came again, wrapping itself around him and sending a shiver through him.

"I'm coming!" He shouted, beginning to run. He wondered if someone was in danger, if Arthur needed him and quickly the forest changed from enchanting to nightmarish. The golden leaves turning black and every shadow spoke of hidden threats.

_Emrys_ it came again, more persistent. _Emrys, are you awake?_

Merlin groaned and rolled over in his bed, pulling the blanket over his head as the dream faded.

_Emrys?_

He frowned, the voice was still there. Opening his eyes he concentrated on the voice. It was strangely familiar and it only took a few more sleepy moments to realize who it was.

_Mordred? What's wrong?_

_I'm sorry, did I wake you?_ Came the quiet reply and Merlin rolled his eyes.

_Well, yes, but what's wrong?_ He asked, not missing the urgency in Mordred's voice and he suddenly felt anxious himself.

_Nothing, I just... I couldn't sleep._ He replied and Merlin frowned. It was incredibly unusual for Mordred to reach out to Merlin like this; unusual and dangerous.

_Why not?_ He asked, worried about the young sorcerer.

Mordred hesitated before he replied and Merlin could see him lying in his bed, his blue eyes dark with hidden pain,_ I keep having nightmares_.

_What about?_ Merlin shifted in his bed, bringing his arms up and folding them behind his head as he looked at the ceiling, picturing Mordred's face as they talked.

_I keep dreaming that Arthur finds out that I have magic_. His voice was thick with emotion and Merlin understood all too well what that felt like.

_I've had that dream too_, he assured him.

_Does it always end with being burned alive?_

_No, not always. Sometimes he finds out and it's ok... he doesn't hate me but accepts me._

_That's definitely a dream_ Mordred replied sadly and Merlin smiled weakly.

_One day Mordred, it won't be like this. I promise you._

_I believe you Emrys_, he answered and they were quiet for several minutes, each lost in their own thoughts. Merlin believed his words without a doubt but he desperately wanted to know _when_ it would be safe for those with magic in Camelot. _When_ would Arthur remove the ban on sorcery? _When_ could they be who they were really? He felt the familiar pang of doubt grip his stomach followed by the loneliness that was never too far. And then he remembered Mordred, a fellow secret sorcerer hiding in plain sight and he couldn't help but smile a little. At least they had each other. Coming across Mordred on their search for their lost knights was the biggest surprise of their trip, although not an unwelcomed one. Well, the whole being beaten and tied of up Mordred's fellow bandits wasn't exactly pleasurable but Mordred had come through in the end. He had even stabbed Morgana to save Arthur's life and had been rewarded by being knighted. He wondered, not for the first time, about that young boy he had met so many years ago. His green cloak flying madly behind him, blue eyes that could swallow the whole sea and the desperate, insist voice in his head crying for his help. He remembered the first time he had met Mordred, how together he, Arthur and Morgana helped him to escape. He smiled as he remembered how Arthur personally saw him returned safely to the druids. His mind wandered tiredly as thoughts of Mordred rolled around and he suddenly found himself wondering about the druid's mark that he remembered seeing on him when he was injured and hiding in Morgana's chambers.

_I still have it_ Mordred's voice caused Merlin to jump slightly in his bed and he could hear Mordred's chuckle follow.

_Don't you worry someone will see it?_ He asked ignoring the fact that he had just been caught thinking about Mordred shirtless.

_Arthur knows that I was raised by the Druids, he knows about the mark_ he replied quietly and Merlin frowned.

_I suppose that's good then, he's come a long way in the years that I've known him and since you first met him._ He acknowledged and then his thoughts strayed again to the mark that had been on his right breast.

_I'll show it to you sometime_ he said voice silky and something about the tone made Merlin blush and turn his face away despite the fact that Mordred was several doors down the corridor.

_Goodnight Mordred_.

_Goodnight Emrys._

The next morning came way too early in Merlin's humble opinion as Gaius shouted loudly from the other room that he needed to hurry up. He groaned and lazily rolled out of bed, barely managing to put his feet down before he toppled out. He stood up slowly, stretching his long arms high above his head and leaning back as he yawned loudly, hand coming down to tiredly scratch his chest. He couldn't place why he was so tired until he remembered his late night mental conversation with Mordred and he smiled in spite of his tiredness. It was nice having someone around who understood what it was like to have magic. He dressed quickly, throwing on his usual blue tunic, brown pants and red neckerchief before blundering out of his room and into the main room. He then realized just how late it really was.

"Morning," he waved quickly to Gaius, grabbing the chunk of bread on his plate before throwing the door open and running down the corridor. He silently cursed Gaius for letting him sleep in and he nearly tripped over his own feet going down the stairs to kitchen. He still had to grab Arthur's breakfast and get to his chambers before the royal prat woke up.

He managed to make it to Arthur's chambers without spilling any of his breakfast and allowed himself a moment to catch his breath before flinging the doors open.

"Good morning!" He shouted in his usual overly cheerful voice. He made a point not to look at the bed; he was sure Arthur would be sitting there scowling at him and about ready to make a comment about his inability to ever be on time. Instead, he carefully but swiftly set the breakfast tray on the table and went to the windows.

"It's going to be a beautiful day!" He practically shouted as he ripped open the curtains to allow the morning light into the dark room. Merlin spun around, a shit-eating grin plastered on his face as he prepared to face Arthur only to be met with an empty bed. The smile fell and he blinked several times only to be startled by someone clearing their throat.

"Good morning _Mer_lin," Arthur said, hands on his hips as he stood by his dressing screen. He managed to get into his breaches and was now standing shirtless, his nightshirt clasped in one fist as he scowled at his servant. Merlin smiled sheepishly and slightly withdrew into himself, preparing for the immediate reprimand he was sure to get.

"Sire! Let me help you with that!" He said quickly rushing to his king's side and grabbing his shirt for the day.

"I've managed this far without you, I think I can make it the rest of the way," said Arthur pointedly, casting a disapproving eye at Merlin as he snatched the shirt from him. "Honestly, why I even bother keeping you around is beyond me. You're the worst manservant I've ever had the displeasure of employing." He jibbed but Merlin could see the familiar twinkle of humor in his eyes so instead of being insulted and possibly afraid for his job, he squared his shoulders and lifted his chin.

"You put up with me _sire_ because you know no one else could handle that fat head of yours." He retorted and moved across the room to gather up stray bits of laundry.

"I should have you thrown in the stocks for your insubordination!" Replied Arthur as he pulled on his shirt. Merlin smirked when he saw that it was not only backwards, but also inside out after having clearly struggled to get it over his head no less.

"Really?" He asked and Arthur was amazed at the amount of sarcasm he was able to put into one word, "you were saying?" He asked as he indicated the state of his shirt with his eyes. Arthur looked down at himself and flushed a deep red and scowling at the smug smirk that Merlin's lips twisted into.

Arthur mumbled several incoherent curses as he pulled at the shirt, attempting to correct it without actually taking it off and Merlin rolled his eyes.

"Good grief Arthur," He scowled and walked over to him. "Stop squirming!" He ordered, grinning at the fact that he was giving the king an order.

"Don't order me around!" He quickly admonished.

"Forgive me sire," Merlin said attempting to sound the least bit sincere as he stepped back, "I'm sure you have this completely under control." He said cheekily, biting the inside of his cheek to keep from bursting out laughing. Arthur glared at him in the most deadly way that he could muster considering his head was barely out of the head hole, his arms twisted and tangled in his shirt so much that it looked like one of the jackets Gaius used for people who had gone completely insane. They stared at each other, Merlin's arms folded across his chest and tapping his foot, eyebrow raised pointedly and Arthur's furrowed angrily in a deep scowl. Finally Arthur deflated and huffed out a sigh.

"Fine, fix it." He ordered, eyes darting away from Merlin in embarrassment but not before catching a glimpse of Merlin's smirk.

"As you wish," he mocked and began untangling Arthur. How he managed to get so tangled was beyond him but then again, Merlin had been dressing himself since he was a toddler whereas Arthur had always had someone else to do that for him. "Prat," he muttered in the most endearing way that he could manage and Arthur couldn't hide the smile that toyed at the corner of his lips.

"So, what do we have today?" Asked Merlin when the whole clothing debacle was behind them and Arthur was finishing his breakfast.

"I have training with the knights. It's Mordred's final test today before he can come out on patrol with us and then I need a bath. After lunch I have a council meeting. While I'm training, you can do the laundry, clean this mess up, polish my boots" he said indicating the bedroom, "and prepare my bath. During the council meeting you can polish my armor, much out the stables and help Gaius with whatever errands he has for you and then bring me my supper." He listed and Merlin made no effort to hide the scowl of disapproval.

"All that?" He scoffed and Arthur sighed, pausing in his eating to look at Merlin with the most annoyed and also amused look that morning.

"Yes _Mer_lin, all that!" He retorted, "It's hardly an unreasonable amount to ask of you."

"Pfft, if you say so," Merlin mumbled and Arthur set his fork down.

"Yes, I do say so Merlin," He answered and pushed away his breakfast. "Now help me into my armor."

Merlin walked down to the training grounds with Arthur. It was an unspoken ritual of theirs that had developed within the first year of working for him. Merlin would accompany him and watch him for at least half an hour for no real purpose other than to provide inappropriate comments about Arthur's inability to wield a sword and to remind the knights that they all had to keep Arthur in his place. It all started with Merlin accompanying him during Merlin's first week and Merlin being Merlin he had to make some remark about Arthur's lazy footwork. That then led to a loud argument between the two where Arthur was firmly called the biggest royal arse in the five kingdoms and Merlin was sent to the stocks for the rest of the day. Merlin attempted to avoid going with Arthur to training after that since he knew that he would not be able to resist the urge to insult the prat but of course, Arthur dragged him with him anyway. It was almost as if Arthur _wanted_ Merlin to insult him because of course Merlin gave into his impulses to do so and ended up in the stocks three more times before Arthur gave up with the stocks all together. Now, over the seven years Merlin had been employed by Arthur, it would just end in a loud bickering match between king and servant that much resembled that of an old married couple but no one would dare point that out.

The day was cool as it the summer was fading and fall was beginning to take a firm hold on the weather. The air was brisk and Merlin's breath came out in little puffy wisps of smoke as they made their way to the circle of gathered knights.

"Good morning," Arthur greeted them and everyone bowed their heads, replying with a joined good morning. "Today is a very special day!" He began and Merlin sank away to the outskirts, leaning on a post to watch.

_Good morning Emrys_ came the gentle whisper and Merlin's gaze immediately found Mordred. He was standing across the field from him, occasionally blocked from his view by a pacing Arthur.

_Aren't you afraid someone's going to hear us?_ He asked worriedly.

_No, I know how to block out anyone else_ he replied easily and Merlin could see him smirk all the way from where he was.

_Oh_, he thought and tilted his head, looking at the younger warlock with a strange fondness, _well good luck today on your big test_. He said just as Arthur's voice raised in volume and cut through their silent conversation.

"Today is Sir Mordred's final test as a knight in training!" He said and all the knights cheered, clapping Mordred proudly on the shoulder making him blush an adorable red. Merlin couldn't stop himself from grinning too. He watched as Arthur and Mordred drew their swords and began circling each other but left before their sparring match got too lively. He had way too much work to do.

"_Mer_lin!" Arthur shouted in annoyance as he threw open the doors to his chambers. At the sound of his voice, the bucket full of hot water Merlin had been about to pour into the bathtub went flying into the air, spilling across the floor.

"Arthur!" He yelped in surprise. He hadn't been expecting him so soon and he had just finished heating the water using magic.

"Great!" Arthur growled as the water sloshed over his boots. He tossed his gloves on the table and placed his hands on his hips, scowling at Merlin with annoyance. "Honestly Merlin, you're as jumpy as a criminal!" Merlin felt his cheeks flush and mentally admitted that he was a criminal.

"Sorry sire," he apologized and quickly bent down to mop up the water with a spare rag.

"Leave it, I wouldn't mind a cool bath anyway, I'm melting in this armor." He instructed and lifted his arms, waiting for Merlin to obediently release him from the confines of the metal. Merlin stood, slipped on the wet floor and crashed into Arthur sending them both tumbling to the floor. "Bloody hell Merlin!" He squawked, attempting to get up but Merlin lay sprawled out over top of him, pinning him to the floor and he was surprisingly heavy.

"I'm so sorry!" He stammered and Arthur shoved him off. After he stood and brushed himself off, he held out his hand and Merlin took it, ears bright red with humiliation.

"You really are completely useless," he said in that tone that indicated he never ceased to amaze him with his stupidity.

"Sorry," he muttered again and quickly began unfastening the clasps on his shoulder plates. Merlin bit his lip, mentally scolding himself for being so stupid. He wasn't normally such a klutz, but he had only been seconds away from being caught using magic and terror was still coursing through his body making his limbs twitch spastically. He managed to calm himself as he set about the familiar task of undressing Arthur. It was almost as calming as meditation he thought, his hands moving easily across the clothing, removing pieces in a practiced manner. After working for him for so long, the daily tasks like removing and polishing armor had become second nature. He set the last of the armor on the table and then proceeded with the king's clothing. As his hands effortlessly moved about removing his shirt, he noticed the tension in the muscles in his back and the stiffness that he moved with.

"Did you injury yourself during training sire?" He asked worriedly as he stood behind him, his hand reaching up to gently touch the slightly swollen shoulder making Arthur wince.

"It's an old injury," he said through clenched teeth.

"Well if you'd like, I can rub it down for you?" Merlin offered, surprising both of them with his offer to do extra work.

"Yes, that would be nice." He admitted as he moved behind his changing screen to remove his pants and tights. Merlin went to the water and quickly pulled a couple vials of rosemary and lavender from his belt. He poured a couple drops of each into the warm water and then placed them back in his pouch. He turned away just as Arthur came around from the screen, a towel wrapped around his waist and Merlin dragged a chair over to the back of the tub while Arthur sank into the water.

"Mmmm" He moaned as the water covered him. It was the perfect temperature, not too hot but still warm enough to relax his muscles.

"Lean back sire," Merlin instructed as he sat on the chair, trying desperately not to let his eyes wander down Arthur's body. Arthur moved backwards in the tub until his back touched the edge. Merlin dipped his hands in the water to let them warm up before he brought them to his king's shoulder. His slender fingers probed the injury gently. He had learned a lot working with Gaius and by gently inspecting the muscles, he knew what it needed. "It would appear that you've agitated your previous injury," he said as he massaged the muscle tenderly, "I'll work the knots loose and have Gaius make you a tincture to help relax your muscles but you shouldn't train for the next two days." He advised him and Arthur groaned.

"I have to train Mordred," He told him and Merlin frowned.

"Did he not do well during his test?" He asked, suddenly worried for the other man.

"No, he did just fine but he still has more training to do as do the other new recruits." He explained and Merlin nodded.

"I'm sure the other knights could substitute for you," he offered and Arthur nodded.

"I suppose you're right," he said before he could stop himself and both men froze at his words.

"Excuse me?" Merlin asked quickly, a smirk easily spreading across his lips and Arthur scrambled to think of an excuse but was failing miserably as the silence stretched to an uncomfortable length. Arthur cleared his throat and shifted in the water.

"I said that I suppose you're not wrong that Leon could substitute for me tomorrow." He weakly rearranged his words, carefully avoiding the word 'right'. Merlin would never let him live it down if he actually acknowledged that he was right for once. Of course Merlin was frequently right, more than Arthur was even willing to admit to himself but he would never, ever, upon pain of death, let _Merlin_ know that. Merlin just snorted behind him before pressing harder than necessary on his sore muscle causing Arthur to grit his teeth.

"You should mop of that water _Mer_lin," Arthur said once his shoulder was beginning to feel better, "it'll ruin the carpet." He didn't know if it would or not, but he didn't think that really mattered.

"Yes sire," Merlin said, managing to make the simple words drip with sarcasm. He watched as Merlin bent down on his hands and knees and began scrubbing the floor dry with a towel and then pulled his eyes away, closing them and sinking further into the water.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Thanks so much for the reviews guys! And wow, lots of followers! Hope you enjoy this next chapter. The next update might be a little slow as I also started another two fics lol I can't stop! I try not to start another one until I've finished one, (although Camelot is ALMOST finished, I just have a few more pages to write there). However, I'm starting up a oneshot for a magic reveal for Merlin/Arthur that was inspired by Bradley James and then I also have a modern day, re-birth of the characters story brewing that might pop up soon if I can figure that out... Anyway, enjoy, happy reading!**

Chapter Two

"Congratulations," Merlin said to Mordred the next morning as he was saddling his and Arthur's horses. They were headed out on a three day patrol of the northern borders and it would be Mordred's first patrol as a fully fledged knight of Camelot.

"Thanks," replied Mordred, a sheepish smile curving his lips. Merlin smiled back, proud of the young man and who he was becoming despite everything that Uther had done to him. Mordred's words came back to him then, _the love that binds us is more important than the power we wield,_ whispering in the back of his mind as he finished with Arthur's saddle. He never expected such powerful words from someone so young but then again, Mordred might be young but he had seen a lot of terrible things in his life and those kinds of things tended to age a man's soul. Merlin knew that all too well. He couldn't help the feeling like he was forgetting something though in regards to Mordred, like there was some sort of reason that he shouldn't trust him but that seemed ridiculous. Mordred had proven himself time and time again to be loyal to Arthur and Camelot. He risked his life for Arthur _and_ Merlin, protecting Merlin with the level of loyalty Merlin had for Arthur. He even wondered sometimes if Mordred was more protective of him than he was of his king. So to feel like he couldn't trust Mordred was really the silliest thought he'd had all morning.

"Ah, Merlin," Arthur said as he strode up to the group of gathered knights, patting Merlin heavily on the shoulder causing him to nose dive into the horse's stomach.

"Morning sire," he mumbled, spitting out a puff of fur and glaring after his insufferable friend. He definitely noticed the snickers of the knights. He finished with his own bags and slipped his foot in the stirrup, pulling himself up with the grace of a wilddeoren. He tried to subtly adjust himself in the saddle in an attempt for a little more comfort before fixing the reigns and turning around to follow after the others. He blinked when Mordred smiled at him. It wasn't the smiling bit that surprised him, it was the fact that he was facing Merlin while his horse went forward and Merlin realized that for some bizarre reason, Mordred was sitting _backwards_ in the saddle.

"What are you doing?" He mouthed, confused and looking around at the others to see if anyone else had suddenly taken up this strange form of riding.

"Melding," he stated as if it was the most obvious thing and Merlin just blinked in response.

"It's the ancient art of melding," Gwaine explained from beside Mordred, sharing sneaky grins with the other knights and Merlin realized they were having a go at him, "every knight must do it on their first patrol." He further explained, "Otherwise the patrol will end horribly."

_You realize that's ridiculous, right?_ Merlin mentally asked, surprised by the fact he managed to do it successfully. "I see," he said out loud to a snickering Gwaine.

_Yes of course,_ Mordred silently scoffed, smiling at Merlin.

_Then why are you doing it?_

_It's a passage of initiation among the knights. I know this is only a way for them to toy with me_. He said, again in that tone of voice that made it sound like Merlin was a complete idiot for not seeing the most obvious thing.

_Why does that matter?_ He found himself asking, which he knew was probably stupid but he needed to know.

_Because it means that I belong Merlin. My willingness to do it shows them that I'm one of them and for once in my life, I feel like I actually do belong_ he replied, voice light but Merlin could feel the loneliness that had plagued Mordred's life and that it was finally dissipating for once; he smiled, completely understanding.

They made their way through the castle grounds and then the lower town and turned down the dirt road heading north. The knights were all in a good mood; grateful for the nice weather that was beginning to reveal itself as the fog lifted. The sky was clear and the sun shone brightly but there was still a pleasant chill to the air that Merlin appreciated. There was nothing worse than riding when it was sweltering or on the other hand, horribly cold. However, today was proving to be the perfect temperature and as they entered the surrounding forest, Merlin lost himself in the beauty of the nature around him. They rode for hours, talking merrily among each other and only pausing briefly at a small stream to eat a cold lunch and let the horses have a drink. They ran into no trouble as the day drew on and eventually, Mordred was informed that he had 'successfully melded the saddle' and was relieve to return to a normal sitting position on his horse.

As they continued northwest, Merlin became quieter and more sullen, letting himself fall back a little behind Arthur instead of riding beside him like usual. Mordred laughed when Arthur made a remark about Gwaine's insufferable chatter that was even worse than Merlin's today, he chanced a glance at the sorcerer and his laughter quickly faded. Merlin's pink lips were pinched into a tight line, his back straight in the saddle and he looked completely on edge and instantly, Mordred wondered what was wrong.

_Are you ok?_ He silently asked and fought back a smile when Merlin visibly jumped half a foot off his saddle.

_You're going to have to start knocking if this is going to become a habit!_ He reprehended but Mordred caught the smile in his eyes.

_Sorry, I will but that doesn't answer my question_ he pointed out and he tried to ignore just how cute Merlin looked when he pouted.

_Can't you feel it?_ He asked and Mordred frowned in confusion.

_Feel what?_

_We're coming close to a sacred place_ he explained, looking curiously at Mordred.

_Is it safe for us?_ He asked and Merlin wasn't entirely sure if he meant if it was safe for _them_ as two sorcerers hidden in the royal court or if he meant safe for the party of knights trampling through the woods. He assumed the later and nodded.

_Yes, I think so. I think it was just a place of worship_ he said thoughtfully.

_How do you know?_ Mordred questioned.

_It feels... peaceful... There's a certain level of reverence due_ he tried to explain and Mordred pinched his lips. Slowly, he carefully unwrapped the bindings he kept around his magic and let himself begin to reach out around him. He didn't immediately feel what Merlin was talking about until a small gust of wind blew across their path and it was like he could feel the earth sighing with him. It was a feeling of being in the presence of something holy that lingered in the air like the morning dew and Mordred instantly gave obeisance to the elemental spirits that dwelled nearby.

_I can feel it_ he said after a moment, reveling in the connection between himself and the earth.

_I wish we could stay here_ Merlin whispered and Mordred looked over at him again, smiling at the content look on his face.

"Sire," Mordred spoke up, causing Arthur to pull on his reigns and halt the party, "there is a small grove of elm trees coming up ahead if I am not mistaken. Perhaps that would be a good place to camp for the night, that way there is still light for us to do a little hunting." He suggested and Arthur beamed at him.

"Excellent idea Sir Mordred!" He said and the other knights nodded their approval.

_Why did you do that?_ Merlin asked after they had quieted down and were coming up to the grove he had spoken of.

_You'll see_ he replied with a secretive smile and Merlin felt his stomach twist in an unexpected way. What was Mordred up to?

"_Mer_lin, any day now!" Arthur's lovely voice pulled Merlin from his thoughts and he glared at the blonde.

"Yes, yes what?" He asked annoy but amused nonetheless. Arthur rolled his eyes and placed a hand on his hip and it was then that Merlin realized Arthur and the rest of the knights were all standing on the ground. He pursed his lips and tried to think of some way to explain his distractedness.

"Well?" Arthur challenged again and Merlin jumped and quick slid off his horse.

"Right, sorry sire," he muttered and took the reins from Arthur.

"Geez Merlin, you would have walked off into the sunset if I hadn't brought your head out of the clouds," he mocked, cuffing the back of Merlin's head and then mussing his hair making Merlin wrinkle his nose and squirm away. Unable to think of a good enough come back, Merlin settled for glaring at him and tying up the horses.

"You stay and set up camp Merlin, we'll go catch something for dinner. Gwaine will stay behind and make sure that you don't set yourself on fire or get swallowed by a thorn bush." Arthur informed the group and Merlin rolled his eyes.

"I don't need someone to babysit me," he scoffed and Arthur including all the knights all gave him a look that clearly said that he was wrong. Merlin watched them walk off into the woods and then turned away, searching out dry wood for a fire.

"Oh don't worry Merlin, I won't let anything happen to you," Gwaine teased, making Merlin pout even further.

"Honestly, I don't know what everyone's talking about! I'm perfectly capable of setting up camp without injuring myself!" He objected but was quickly proved otherwise when he turned around and tripped over an exposed root, falling flat on his face.

"You were saying?" Laughed Gwaine as he pulled him to his feet.

They set about setting up camp, Gwaine helping as much as a mosquito and provided a constant buzz of chatter. By the time the rest returned, the sky had darkened significantly and Merlin had a steady fire going. He had collected several herbs and roots and was preparing a stew for whatever meat they returned with. It was a successful short hunting trip and they returned with three rabbits and a peasant and Merlin quickly went to work on preparing them for dinner.

The knights lazily gathered around and made Mordred pull together several fallen trees for them to sit against. They talked loudly amongst themselves, laughing easily and teasing Mordred endlessly and Merlin listened, adding in a few sarcastic remarks of his own. As usual, Merlin was the last to get any of the stew he made, but thankfully, he did get some. After dinner, he washed the dishes in a nearby stream and then sat with Arthur and was uncharacteristically quiet while they talked long into the night.

Eventually, the knights grew tired and decided that it was time to call it in. Merlin laid his bedroll a couple feet from Arthur as he always did, pulled off his boots and lay down.

"Do you need anything else sire?" He asked his king one last time for the day, resting his head on the side of his arm.

"No, Merlin, that will be everything," tiredly replied Arthur who was lying down and facing his servant.

"Alright, good night Arthur," Merlin said, making Arthur smile and close his eyes.

"Goodnight Merlin," he said just when Merlin thought he wasn't going to respond. Merlin smiled and rolled onto his back, staring up at the stars and began counting. It only took a few minutes before he drifted off to sleep. It had been a long day of riding and though uneventful, he was still incredibly tired.

_Emrys_ came the whisper, entering his dream like a vapor, streaming in and tugging at his consciousness. Merlin opened his eyes to find Mordred kneeling over him, his hand gently shaking him awake.

"What is it? Is everything ok?" He asked, attempting to shake off the last of his dream.

"Yes, everything's ok. Come with me." Mordred gently ordered and handed Merlin his boots.

"Where are we going?" He stuffed his feet inside, looking up at Mordred and he accepted Mordred's extended hand when he moved to stand up.

"Shh, I'll explain in a moment," he whispered and with that, he turned away and led Merlin away from the camp. Merlin tiptoed as best as he could, looking over his shoulder to make sure no one stirred. He followed Mordred into the dark woods, carefully avoiding branches and stumbling only a little on hidden roots and vines. Slowly, the familiar feeling of magic began to slide over his flesh leaving gooseflesh in its wake and the hairs at the back of his neck raised and danced not in fear but purely so he could feel ever sensation the magic left on him. It continued to grow and grow until they finally came to another small grove with a large rock in the center.

"What is this place?" Merlin asked, sea blue eyes taking in every inch around him and coming to a stop on Mordred's face.

"It's an alter," he replied and turned away from him, walking up to the large stone. In the light of the full moon, Merlin could see small markings on the stone. Upon closer inspection, he realized they were runes of the old religion.

"How did you know it was here?" He questioned as he trailed his fingers over the runes.

"I stayed here once, when I was a boy," he answered, voice growing distant, "just before we came to Camelot where I met you for the first time."

"How do you know it's an alter?"

"The markings," he explained and ran his hand over the runes, brushing pleasantly against Merlin's hand, "this is a place of worship. It's small and otherwise unnoticeable but it's a natural resting place of the elemental spirits so the magic is stronger here. This is what you were feeling before. I didn't recognize the area until I felt its magic again."

"What are we doing here?" Merlin asked anxiously. Arthur was so close; he didn't want to risk being caught.

"I thought we would come pay our respects to the spirits. In four days is the harvest feast but tonight is the autumn equinox." He said and pointed up to the moon above them. "There is a ritual among my people, our people; I thought we could perform it."

"Are you crazy?" Merlin's eyes widened and he stepped closer to him, lowering his voice even further, "if anyone were to wake up and come looking for us, they would catch us doing magic!" He hissed.

Mordred smiled, "they won't wake up and no one will catch us. There's hardly any actual magic in it." He encouraged, his eyes looked even paler in the moonlight as he studied Merlin, "please Merlin? It's completely safe."

Merlin chewed his lip and looked back towards the camp as he considered it. He had to admit, it was incredibly tempting to want to do magic with Mordred. It had been so long since he had done any kind of magic with anyone and never with someone as powerful as Mordred. He looked back at the younger boy staring up at him and felt his resolve melt away. "Ok, but we have to be quiet." He finally agreed and the smile that took over Mordred's face made Merlin think that it would all be worth it just to see that smile.

"Great!" Mordred exclaimed quietly and dug into the pouches at his belt. He pulled out a candle, a small bottle of salt, a bowl and untied his water skin from its place. He poured the salt into a small pile at the top of the rock, "Can you get me some pine needles?" He asked, glancing over at a watchful Merlin.

"Sure," Merlin walked over to a nearby pine tree and grabbed a small branch that had broken off and pulled off a handful of needles. "Here," he said as he held open his hand.

"Place them there," Mordred indicated to the right side of the rock and Merlin set them down in a small pile. At the bottom, Mordred had set the candle and to the left he poured water into the bowl.

"What are you doing?" He asked, unable to resist the urge to learn more about anything magic related.

"These all represent the elements. Earth," he pointed to the salt, "I'll burn these to create smoke for air, fire and then water," he explained and smiled warmly at Merlin. It felt incredibly weird to be speaking so openly about something so forbidden but Merlin relished it.

"Are we going to be calling on the elements?" He asked excitedly, a wave of anticipation sending a shiver over his body.

"Yes, we're going to call on the elements and then give thanks for this year's harvest and all the bounty we've been blessed with." Mordred elaborated and Merlin grinned and stole another glance over his shoulder. "Even if Arthur does wake up, he knows that I am a Druid Merlin and he has removed the ban on Druid beliefs. If he saw us, I will just explain to him that I wasn't doing any magic but just paying tribute in the way of my people." He reassured him.

"Ok," he nodded and rubbed his slightly chilled fingers together.

"I'm going to call on each element. When I call on fire, will you light the candle?" He asked with a small smile and Merlin nodded.

"Alright," he agreed and watched as Mordred turned back to the rock in front of them.

"I call to the ancient Spirits of Air;" Mordred began to speak, his voice taking on a powerful tone and immediately, Merlin felt the wind pick up and the magic he was calling grow, "I ask that you guard me and mine with winds of insight. Guard this sacred circle in the East, Guardians of the Mind!" His eyes glowed gold and the needles began to smoke. Merlin bit his lip, unable to take his eyes off Mordred. He didn't look like the little boy he once was, and the boyish look on his face was long gone and in its place, a man with a powerful and seductive air to him.

"I call to sacred Spirits Fire; I ask that you burn brilliantly here with the light of might and passion. Guard this circle in the South, Guardians of the Will!" Merlin's eyes flared gold, pulling his gaze away from Mordred to look at the candle. The wick burst into a small flame and he couldn't stop himself from smiling. It felt so good to use his magic. "I call to divine Spirits of Water; I ask that you guard me and mine with your oceans of mystery and majesty. Guard this circle in the West, Guardians of Creativity and Intuition!

I call to ancient Spirits of the Earth; I ask that you guard me and mine with the strength of stone and the richness of your soil. Guard this circle in the North, Guardians of the Body!

I call the spirits of my ancestors to this circle and ask that you join me, bringing your insight and truth with you. Guard me with integrity and seal this sacred circle!" He finished, his voice strong and powerful and Merlin gasped as the magic swirled around them. He closed his eyes, savoring the feeling and somehow, his hand found its way into Mordred's. Mordred squeezed it gently as they shared this rare moment where they could be themselves so completely. They both grinned stupidly as the felt the elemental spirits surround them, the heat of fire warming their cheeks, the air tossing their hair, the earth humming beneath them and their lungs filled with the scent of the sea.

"Wow," Merlin finally said after a few minutes had passed and let out a small chuckle, "that was amazing."

"And that's just the beginning," Mordred replied, a cheeky smile turning his lips and he turned back to the stone. He still held Merlin's hand firmly in his own as he began to speak again, "I honor thee, my Autumn Queen, and thy consort, the Gods of the Harvest. This wheel has turned once more, and the change of season begins. What was, what is and what will be. We mark the Equinox, the time to reflect and we gather in this sacred space and we feel the change as we pass from one season to the next. The second harvest reaped and now the time of rest is deserved. Go now, my Mother and slumber. Go now my Father and dream of re-birth, and we shall be here to greet Thee on Your return.

"As days grow cold, and the nights longer, may I remember the summer past. With sunlight fading, and hearth inviting; my memories will warm my soul. From a season of hard work, I hear my Mother's voice calling me forward. While I rest, she shall lull me to sleep, with songs of a dream and memories of the summer I shall never forget." He paused and picked up two sticks from the ground and held them up in his hands, "I honor thee with this symbol of nature, I shall keep Thee in my home and heart; that I may see it and pause to reflect on the Old Ways and Old Religion, leading me to a better understanding of myself, of others and of all that is Life." As he continued to speak, little golden lights began to appear in the clearing around them, blinking and glistening in the moonlight. Merlin watched in fascination, all around them the forest buzzed with life and they were pulled into it, losing themselves in the earth. Merlin had no idea where he began and his magic ended. Mordred's magic combined with his own, bleeding together so that they were completely one with nature and the feeling of being a part of something far larger than them was so overwhelming. He felt so incredibly small and at the same time, so very important.

"Between the worlds I stand in this sacred place, with all time is here and now. As I leave this circle, the season shall have changed, and I with it. May I use the short time of Winter Finding to draw the strength and power from within as I continue my quest for vision, understanding, and peace. In Life is Death, and in Death is Life, so continues the Sacred Dance on and on, from whence we came, we shall return and come again. Seasons pass and pass again, the circle stays unbroken." He finished with his eyes closed, recalling the ritual from his memory. When they opened their eyes again, the entire clearing was lit up with the golden lights, casting the circle in a golden glow.

"This is incredible," Merlin whispered, reaching out with his free hand to touch the lights, "does this always happen?" He asked and looked over at an equally awed Mordred.

"No, I've never seen this happen." He whispered back, both of them stared open mouthed at the sparkling lights.

"Where the hell is Merlin?" Arthur growled from somewhere behind them. Instantly, the clearing fell into darkness and Merlin released Mordred's hand. Mordred blew out the candle and snuffed out the smoking needles with his hands. Mordred pressed one of the sticks into his hand before putting the other in his pouch with the candle.

"Over here sire," Merlin called, casting a final glance at Mordred before pushing through the bush and walking back to camp.

"Where the hell were you?" He snapped when Merlin stumbled into the little clearing.

"I just went to relieve myself, my Lord," he lied easily, glaring at Arthur for good measure, "did you miss me?"

"No," He grumbled and rolled back over, "the fire is dying though and it's bloody freezing. Do something about it," he ordered and Merlin rolled his eyes.

"Yes sire," he said with a sigh and added another log to the fire just as Mordred also reappeared from the trees. Arthur had his back to him and thankfully did not see the druid return otherwise Merlin was sure he would have to answer some awkward questions. Silently, Mordred slipped back onto his bedroll, pulling his blanket over his shoulders and closing his eyes. Merlin stoked the fire and when he was satisfied that it would burn warmly for the rest of the night, he lay back down on his own bedroll.

_Thank you Mordred,_ he mentally whispered, looking across the flames.

_You're welcome Merlin. Goodnight_ he whispered back and smiled at him before closing his eyes and going back to sleep. Merlin couldn't sleep right away though. He lay on his back staring up at the sky replaying the ritual in his mind. He had done a couple small spells with Gaius before when he needed the extra power, like when he had to heal Arthur that one time when he was poisoned. But he had never done anything like what they had just done that night. It wasn't a spell to save someone's life, it wasn't magic used to protect someone or even just for play, it had been something completely different. He felt connected to the Old Religion in a way he hadn't before and it wasn't in a bad way at all. It actually felt incredibly good, somehow so right and he felt more renewed than he ever did. He finally drifted off to a light sleep with a smile still on his lips when the sky was just barely beginning to lighten.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Ah...here it is, the third chapter. Sorry it took so long to update! Had to finished Camelot Inc and Morag's. Hopefully, I'll have another chapter up this week but I have two more stories to update as well. I need to update my LOTR fic and also Merely Mortal, my original story that's available at So it might take me some time... also, started a Sherlock fic. But who knows! I might not be feeling any of those and want to just continue on with this one for a bit! I already have the start of the next chapter rolling in my head right now so ya... Anyway, thanks for the reviews! I hope you enjoy this chapter, happy reading!**

Chapter Three

Merlin woke the next morning to the gentle but persistent kicks from Arthur. He groaned loudly, trying but failing to ignore his king and finally gave up when Arthur's foot came back for another kick.

"You're incredibly rude," he barked at Arthur and sat up, glaring up at him.

"And you're incredibly lazy!" He retorted, a floppy grin gracing his elegant features and Merlin tried very hard to hold back his own smile. "Now get up Merlin and get the horses ready."

"Ugh, you're so bossy," he mumbled under his breath, hoping he wouldn't hear but by now, Arthur was so used to Merlin's mumbling that he would notice it even in a room full of talking people.

"I'm _bossy_ because I'm the _king_," said Arthur, cuffing Merlin upside the back of the head before winking and walking over to the sparing knights. Merlin watched him walk away, trying and failing to hide the stupid grin as he rolled up his bedroll. He noticed Mordred standing with the others, Gwaine's arm thrown loosely over his shoulders and Merlin felt something pull at his stomach, a kind of longing that he was only accustom to feeling in regards to Arthur. He frowned and shook his head, trying to clear away the feelings and focus on getting everything ready.

They departed the campsite an hour later after Merlin had fed the knights and saddled the horses. He was exhausted but the excitement from the night before was still racing through his mind and it put him in a relatively good mood. The group rode on in an easy silence, lightly chit chatting with each other every few minutes but overall, everyone seemed to be quietly appreciating the woods around them. Mordred was lost in a mixture of memories and emotions as he walked through the familiar woods, memories of being here with his father emerged from the sealed vaults of his past and filled him with a dull aching pain.

"Merlin," Arthur called from the front of the group.

"Yes my lord?" He shouted back. They had quietly been riding for just over an hour and Merlin, distracted by his thoughts, had fallen behind the others.

"Come here," he ordered and Merlin spurred his horse forward, trotting past the others and falling in step with his king.

"Is everything alright?" He asked worriedly and Arthur smiled over at him.

"Yes, just don't want you to fall too far behind and get lost," he jested and Merlin glared at him but he broke into a smile moments later. They continued to ride beside each other, feeling no need to talk but falling into the kind of comfortable silence that only happens with the closest of friends.

It happened before Merlin could warn Arthur, before his mind was even registering the threat. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a flash of blue and the next thing he knew, he was laying flat on his back, screaming ringing in his ears. He had been so comfortable and relaxed that he hadn't noticed the bandit before he jumped from the bushes onto Merlin's horse, successfully knocking him off.

"Arthur!" Merlin instinctively cried out and scrambled to his knees. Blood dripped from his brow over his eyes and he hastily wiped it away with the back of his hand and squinted at his surroundings. They were under attack by a large group of bandits, at least ten men all together. It was a blur of red and blue cloaks as the men spun around each other, their swords clashing together in a symphony of steel. Merlin pulled himself to his feet and spotted Arthur fifteen feet away, fighting against two of the swordsmen. He was moving with the elegance of a hummingbird, feet lightly stepping on the forest ground as he moved swiftly, plunging his sword into the one bandit only to rip it away just in time to slash the other's chest open before he could bring his sword down on the king. Merlin quickly looked at the other knights, assessing the situation with lightening speed. Percival and Gwaine stood back to back, fighting their way towards Arthur and they moved together as if they were one body, their movements mirroring each other's in perfect harmony. Percival's face was pulled tight in concentration, his lips forming a hard line but Gwaine's eyes were alight with the thrill of the fight. Merlin could just hear his voice over the fight, no doubt he was making a smart remark to his opponent and Merlin saw him laugh loudly before he turned his attention elsewhere. Mordred was dueling with a man who held two short swords but Merlin knew he didn't need to worry about him. Out of everyone here, Mordred was the one with the best chances of defending himself and so he gauged Leon and Elyan. They were both fighting another two and Arthur was closing in on another. Merlin's eyes quickly darted around, he was sure he had seen a tenth man. He ran towards the fallen body of one of the bandits and grabbed the sword.

"Merlin! Watch the horses!" Arthur shouted, not wanting his vulnerable manservant to get injured.

"They're fine!" He shouted back but he paused, subtly sending out his magic around him, tendrils spreading out around them as he searched for the other man. There, he felt the threat and turned to his right. The bandit was just sneaking up behind Arthur but before he could draw his weapon, Merlin raised his hand. Powerful words spilled from his lips as he summoned his magic, time suddenly stilled and his eyes flashed gold as the power was released from his hand. The bandit was thrown backwards into the woods, his body crushing against an alder tree and through the connection of magic; Merlin heard his back snap upon impact. He lowered his hand in a rush, eyes anxiously darting about to see if he had been noticed but as usual, he went unseen, the others too busy to notice what he'd done. He was about to relax, knowing the fight was nearly over as Gwaine killed the second last man. The last one though, a smaller man who was faster than the heavily armored knights danced around them, deflecting their strikes easily. It was then that Merlin noticed the chain around his neck, a large stone hung from the metal and Merlin could sense the magic coming from it.

"Arthur look out!" He shouted, raising his hand but he was too late. The sorcerer had already raised his hands, throwing the closest knights to their backs and rushing forward. Mordred was closer and faster than Merlin and just as the killer raised his hand again, Mordred stepped in front of Arthur and the blast of the spell hit the young druid in the right shoulder with such force he was thrown in the air and landed in an unconscious heap. The distraction of failing to hit his target was enough for Gwaine to come up behind the sorcerer and run him through with his sword.

"Mordred!" Arthur shouted and ran towards the knight who had just saved his life. He rolled him onto his back, his hands slipping on the blood that poured from his shoulder. "Merlin! Quickly!" He called for the apprenticing physician. Merlin raced across the path and got on his knees beside Mordred.

"I need bandages," He demanded and Leon quickly began ripping his cloak apart, handing the strips of cloth to Arthur. Merlin peeled away Mordred's cloak and began removing his armor. When he finally managed to get access to the wound, his stomach lurched dangerously into his mouth but he bit back the bile and pressed his lips tightly together. There was a deep gash to his right shoulder and the right side of his chest that was deep enough Merlin could see the muscles and the veins as the blood was pushed from them. Sharp eyes assessed the damage, taking in the burns around the edge of the wound, that was good Merlin thought, the edges of the wound had been cauterised. It was the gaping eight inch hole that was the problem. He snatched the bandages from Arthur's hands and pressed them hard against the wound. At the sudden burst of added pain, Mordred was ripped back to consciousness and screamed. Eyes wide and terrified like a wounded animal, he tried to move away from the preserved threat.

"Mordred calm," Merlin said over Mordred's cries of pain, "everyone back up!" He demanded, completely disregarding the fact that they were knights and the king of Camelot. Titles and positions didn't matter, all that mattered was keeping Mordred alive and the only way he could do that was with magic. He needed the space so that no one could see his face and once they had given him a berth of several feet, he locked eyes with Mordred.

"Merlin," He gasped, his breath coming in short painful gasps as his hands clung tightly to Merlin's shirt.

"It's going to be ok Mordred," he assured him. The scared, clumsy manservant Merlin disappeared as the strong and calm sorcerer in him took over. He held Mordred's gaze as he whispered words of magic so quietly they hardly made a sound but it was enough. Merlin's eyes shone golden and immediately, Mordred relaxed as the pain-relieving magic made its way through his body. He couldn't heal Mordred completely, but as his magic completely filled Mordred, he could feel two other sources of magic. His brushed up against Mordred's causing a pleasant gasp to escape Mordred's lips and gold to momentarily sparkle in his irises. Feeling that magic against his own sent a shiver through Merlin but he couldn't focus on that and just as quickly, he moved away and wrapped his magic around the second source. He probed it gently, feeling and tasting it as if he could actually grab a hold of it but he busied his hands with trying to stop the blood. The wound was still bleeding too much despite the pressure and as Merlin tugged at the magic, he realized the magic was preventing his blood from clotting somehow.

"No," he hissed angrily and Arthur stepped over.

"What is it Merlin? Is he going to be ok?" He asked worriedly, his face drawn with concern and Merlin shook his head.

"The magic from the blast is keeping his blood from clotting. He's going to bleed out if I don't do something." He told him and Arthur looked around at his knights.

Leaning in closer, he whispered, "are you saying only magic can stop this wound?" He asked, eyes burning into the top of Merlin's head.

"No, I'm saying I need medicine. Can all of you go look for yarrow?" He asked; Arthur nodded.

"Everyone, spread out, look for the yarrow plant!" He shouted and just like that, they were alone on the road. Merlin looked around, checking to make sure no one was watching. He pulled the now soaking bandages off and pressed his hand against the wound. Ignoring the slick feeling of muscle and blood, he closed his eyes.

"_Ic þe þurhhæle þin licsare. Ic þe þurhhæle þin licsare__**[1]**__..._" He spoke, his voice deep and commanding as he said the healing spell. It would not physically heal the wound, but it would remove the magic that was the more immediate threat. He opened his eyes, the last remnants of gold fading as he felt his magic burn away the other's.

Just as Percival came stumbling through the bushes, shouting that he had found it, fist clenching around a handful of the plant, the magic had completed its work. Merlin sighed with relief and reached out for the herb. Now that the magic was removed, he needed to stop the bleeding and yarrow was perfect for the task. He ripped the leaves and flower petals off the stalk and chewed them until they became a thick paste which he spat out onto his hand and then pressed against the wound. It was messy and unsanitary but they could attend to any risks of infection once they reached Gaius. Merlin pulled off his shirt and ripped it apart for new bandages. Leon's torn cloak lay discarded to the side, dripping with blood. He covered the wound with several strips and then tightly wrapped his sleeves around Mordred's shoulder, knotting the ends together with nimble fingers.

"He should be ok until we can get to Gaius," He said to the gathered knights.

"Quick, grab Sir Mordred's horse," Arthur instructed and Leon disappeared and reappeared with the chestnut. Percival and Arthur lifted the injured knight up and onto the horse. They tied his legs to his saddle and placed his cloak in front of him, creating a pillow for him to lean on.

"Tie his arm to his body," Merlin advised as he pulled out a new shirt from his pack, trying desperately to ignore his bloody hands. They did as he said and then tied the now unconscious Mordred against his horses' neck. The horse was accustomed to having injured bodies strapped to him and showed no signs of discomfort. They jumped onto the backs of their horses, Arthur holding the reigns to Mordred's.

"Hurry up Merlin!" Arthur barked as Merlin raced over to the dead sorcerer, "what are you doing?"

"I want to make sure he's dead!" He lied but it seemed to satisfy them. He knelt down beside the body and rolled him onto his side. Discreetly, he removed the necklace and pocketed the stone.

"Well?"

"He's dead," Merlin confirmed although he didn't need to check for a pulse, the vacant eyes told him all he needed to know.

"Then hurry it up!" Merlin ran back to his horse, climbed on in a fumbling mess and barely managed to get his other foot in the stirrup before the others were racing down the path. He didn't have to kick his horse, she was already running behind them and Merlin lowered his body against hers to avoid hitting outstretched branches. They ran without slowing down until the horses were covered in a thick coat of sweat and could run no longer. Arthur called them to a slow trot, allowing the horses to catch their breath and they continued like that for a few more hours. They were headed straight back to Camelot, not taking the roundabout route they had come but instead travelled in a straight line southeast. When the silhouette of the castle came into view, they spurred their horses on again. Hooves pounded against earth in a thundering chorus as they broke from the trees and onto the open field below the lower town. They gave no pause as they raced through the streets, shouting at the townspeople to get out of the way and leaping over small crates. Arthur was halfway out of his saddle when they finally came to a halt at the front of the castle. They were met with the other knights who had spotted the party of red racing to the palace.

"Go get Gaius!" Arthur shouted as he jumped down and began untying the bonds that kept Mordred secure. Two knights quick ran off to find the court physician and the Arthur and Percival carefully pulled Mordred down. Gwaine and Elyan came forward with a stretcher that the kings guard had nearby for such situations and they lowered Mordred onto it. They were halfway to Gaius' chambers when the old man caught up to them.

"What happened?" He demanded, pushing his way past the others and coming up to Merlin.

"Bandits," Arthur answered and they burst through the door. Gaius and Merlin quickly cleared off the table and they set Mordred on it.

"I've stopped the bleeding with yarrow but he went into shock an hour ago," Merlin informed him, grabbing bottles of dried herbs he knew they would need and placing them on the table beside Gaius, "he's lost over two quarts of blood," he warned and Gaius shot him a very concerned look before handing a bucket to Merlin.

"Quick! Go get some water. Everyone else, please leave and give me space to work." He shouted and quickly began removing the bandage Merlin had made.

Merlin sprinted from the room to the well. He quickly filled the bucket and walked as fast back as he could without spilling. By the time he was back in the room, the knights and king had cleared out and Gaius was washing the wound.

"Use your magic to heat the water Merlin," Gaius said and Merlin was surprised with the sudden request but didn't hesitate. He looked at the water and said a quick spell that raised the temperature to near boiling point.

"What can I do?"

"Finish cleaning the wound while I make a poultice and tell me what the hell happened," He instructed and moved out of the way. Merlin dunked a rag into the water and wrung it out.

"We were attacked by bandits," he explained as he gently began removing the bits of herb with the cloth, "there was a sorcerer among them, he had this," he pulled out the stone and held it up. Gaius glanced over and his eyes widened and eyebrows shot up to his hairline.

"Merlin if Mordred was hit by a sorcerer wearing that, the wound-"

"Won't heal without magic, I know," Merlin finished for him, "I had to use magic to remove the sorcerer's enchantment. What is this?"

"It's the stone of Glorith, very powerful and very dangerous," he said in that knowing tone of his as he crushed several herbs in his mortar. "It gives the bearer added power when casting spells. By the looks of it, this sorcerer used a powerful spell."

"It was powerful," He confirmed, "it was keeping his blood from clotting and I had to use the healing spell the Euchdag taught me."

"Well it's a good thing you were there," Gaius said and came over to stand beside him while he stirred the herbs into a mixture of water and made a thick paste. "If he'd lost any more blood, he would have died."

"I know," Merlin sighed and pulled away so that Gaius could begin applying the poultice, "is he going to be ok?"

"Yes, assuming we can keep it clear of any infection, he should be fine, thanks to you. It will be a nasty scar though and there might be damage to the muscle but we'll only know for sure once it heals." He answered.

When he finished applying the healing paste, which he had enchanted with a healing spell just to ensure added strength, he carefully bandaged the knight. Merlin was just finishing washing the blood from his hands when Mordred managed to open his eyes. The room was dark save for two small candles on the table. Gaius had left to get some more herbs to make more of the sticky paste for tomorrow and the two sorcerers were alone for the moment.

"Merlin," Mordred called out, his voice cracking and his mouth felt like sandpaper.

"Mordred," Merlin spun around and quickly went to him with a cup of water, "here drink this," he lowered the cup to his mouth and Mordred lifted his left hand, wrapping it around Merlin's and the cup and drank greedily.

"Thank you," he said when it was completely drained and Merlin was sitting beside the bed.

"How are you feeling?" He asked, his storm blue eyes searching Mordred's paled face.

"A bit like death," he answered, managing to smile weakly before wincing and closing his eyes. "What happened?"

"You saved Arthur's life... again." Merlin said, his muscles finally beginning to relax from the extreme stress of it all.

"Oh, well I suppose that's a good thing," he joked and Merlin chuckled quietly.

"You scared me," he said after a moment of silence and he looked back to see Mordred staring at him with those piercing eyes.

_I'm sorry_ he whispered.

"You should save your strength," Merlin warned but Mordred shook his head.

_Thank you Emrys, you saved my life_.

"You saved our king," he replied with a smile and Mordred smiled back.

"Is everyone else alright?"

"Yes, everyone's fine. You won't be for awhile though. No training for a month." He ordered and Mordred gaped at him.

"Seriously? A month?!"

"Yes, a month. The wound is incredibly deep, you're lucky to be alive."

"Good thing we had such a skilled _individual_ on patrol with us," he answered making Merlin's cheeks flush.

"It was nothing," he mumbled, turning away to dip a clean cloth in the bucket of water. He turned back and began wiping Mordred's face, gently wiping away the blood and sweat. Mordred closed his eyes, leaning his head to Merlin's hand and let the cool water sooth him.

"How long do I get to stay here?" He asked tiredly.

"Until you can be left alone, so at least tonight and tomorrow. We want to make sure you don't go into shock again" he replied, brushing his matted hair from his forehead and checking to make sure he didn't have a fever.

"Mmm, lucky me," he smiled and closed his eyes. Merlin was glad he didn't see the way his cheeks burned. "You're hurt." He said a few moments later and Merlin blinked, confused.

"Huh?"

"Your head," He said, opening his eyes and pointing to the cut on Merlin's forehead. He had completely forgotten about it until Gaius had finished with Mordred and insisted on letting him inspect it.

"Oh, it's nothing," He shook his head reassuringly.

"You sure?" Mordred asked worriedly.

"Yea, now get some sleep," he advised and squeezed his hand gently. Mordred squeezed back but didn't let go, keeping Merlin seated beside him.

"Stay until I fall asleep, please?" He asked, opening one eye to look at him questioningly. Merlin nodded, too stunned to say anything. Mordred smiled and closed his eyes again. He was asleep within minutes.

* * *

><p>[1] Spell is the healing spell from episode 2 of Season 5 by the Euchdag on Sir Gwaine. Reference found on .com<p>


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: Yay another chapter! Thank you for your reviews of chapter three. I just wanted to say a special thanks to a couple people.**

**Mersan123-thanks for all your comments on all my writing! I'm happy to see you here reading What If and glad you're enjoying it :D**

**20000 WPM-you're so right, they really can't go into those woods without being attacked. You'd think they'd learn by now that the woods equals danger! And lol, I'm glad you're liking this Mordred. I'm hoping to turn a few people's perception of Mordred around a bit :P**

**Emeraldblood9- :D Thanks! Writing fight scenes is always fun and I should do it more often! This story will be chalked full of awesome fights **

**Again, thanks to EVERYONE who's been reading and reviewing or just reading or who's favorited this story. I have found the most epic, perfect song for Mordred. I'm not a big music person but sometimes when I'm struggling with writers block, I'll listen to some. The song "Come Undone" by FFH is the song that I've been looking for for Mordred's character forever. It's absolutely perfect and I love it and just had to share. Anyway, enjoy this chapter! Lots of fun fluffiness in this one and it's really retardedly long lol**

Chapter Four

Mordred slept through the entire night and through most of the following day. Gaius tended to him dutifully, woke him every few hours to drink a cup of tea and eat a bowl of soup. Even though Merlin wanted to stay with the druid, his first duty was to Arthur and unfortunately that meant going back to work as usual. The harvest banquet was held the following night and Merlin was kept so busy he hardly had time to eat or sleep let alone check in with the patient currently occupying his bed. The other knights were quiet and reserved, all painfully obviously worried about their youngest member and they frequently stopped in to check on him despite Gaius' many reassurances that he was doing just fine. They didn't really stop worrying until three days later when Gaius had agreed to let Mordred return to his own chambers to continue his recovery. With one arm wrapped around Merlin's shoulder, Mordred made his way to his room. Gaius and Merlin helped him into bed and Merlin poured water from a pitcher into a cup while Gaius inspected the wound.

"Really guys," Mordred sighed, "I'm _fine_." He insisted tiredly but Gaius ignored him, his wrinkled but strong fingers adjusting the bandage.

"You're not fine," he scolded like a mother hen, "you're lucky to be alive. Don't get any ideas now, Mordred. You need to stay in bed until that wound heals!"

"Yes sir," Mordred said seriously but his young eyes danced with amusement and Gaius scowled, his bushy eyebrows pinched together.

"I'll be coming back in the evening to change and dress the wound." He informed him and gathered up his medicine bag.

"Alright," he leaned back against his pillows and closed his eyes. Despite his jokes and attitude, the walk from Gaius' chambers to his own had exhausted him. He found it incredibly frustrating to be rendered so immobile and he wanted to heal himself but he knew that if he did, it would draw too much attention. Arthur wasn't as suspicious of sorcery as Uther, but spontaneously healing would definitely raise some eyebrows.

"Get some sleep," Merlin advised as he set the pitcher and goblet on the bedside table.

"Mmhmmm" Mordred agreed. Merlin and Gaius slipped out of the room noiselessly.

Merlin went about his day as usual. In the morning after getting Mordred settled, he went back to clean Arthur's room. Then he did several errands for Gaius and returned in time to get Arthur's bath ready. He sat down at the table, Arthur's armor laid out before him ready to be polished and Merlin listened as Arthur splashed the water as he cleaned himself.

"I'm glad Mordred will be alright," Arthur said, startling Merlin out of his mindless task of polishing.

"Hmm? Oh yes, me too," he agreed and continued polishing the breastplate.

"I suppose you're not completely incompetent," he said, complimenting the servant in his roundabout way and Merlin smiled.

"That's what I've been saying for years," he sighed and shot Arthur a teasing glare.

"Yes well every time you do something halfway decent, you muck everything else up," he pointed out and Merlin pouted although he wasn't entirely wrong. It did always seem that Merlin managed to mess several things up at the same time as fixing one thing.

"That's not completely true," He argued and finished with the breastplate, he put it aside and picked up the helmet.

"Hmm well at least you were there to help Mordred. I owe that boy my life," said Arthur, leaning back in the water and looking at the opposite wall distractedly.

"Yes," Merlin agreed although he wanted to point out that _he_ had saved Arthur's life several times and also saved his life that day however he said nothing. He was still feeling too guilty about not reacting fast enough in the first place to feel more than a quick sting for all his unnoticed acts of bravery.

"He keeps doing that, I should reward him... what do you think would be something Mordred would like?" He asked, looking at Merlin and Merlin's brows rose in thought.

"I don't know," he looked over at Arthur and shrugged, "there isn't much that Mordred cares for."

"Well what _does_ he care for _Mer_lin?"

Merlin sighed and stopped his polishing to look at his friend with an exasperated expression, "why would I know?"

"Because you're his friend," Arthur said just as exasperated as Merlin felt. Merlin wrinkled his nose, was he his friend? He wasn't entirely sure about that, it was always so difficult to figure out the nature of his relationships with those of higher status.

"You're his friend too," he countered, turning the question back around on him.

"Not really, I mean, I'm as much his friend as I am anyone's but I'm not really _anyone's_ friend. I'm the king, I never know who's my friend because they want to be or if they just feel they have to be." He said quietly, keeping his unsure eyes away from Merlin.

"I'm your friend," Merlin said gently, looking over at him with kind eyes and Arthur smiled that smile that Merlin knew only he ever got to see.

"And you're the only one that I really believe." He replied.

"Not even Leon? Or Gwaine?" Merlin set aside his polishing and focused solely on the king. It was disturbing to him that he didn't feel he was close to anyone else.

"Gwaine," Arthur snorted, "is only friends with Percival."

"Hardly! He's friendly with everyone."

"A little too friendly," Arthur joked and Merlin laughed, "but seriously Merlin. I care about my knights, they're like brothers to me but I will always be their king and that's how they'll always see me, they have to."

"I understand that," Merlin sighed, "but I would think there was at least one other person you could trust."

"No," he shook his head. He had learned the consequences of trusting too many people. He had trusted all too easily in his life and it had led to being betrayed by everyone in the end. Merlin was the only one who hadn't betrayed him and the only person he could ever allow himself to truly trust without hesitation anymore. "But this isn't about me and who I can trust," he said suddenly, annoyed as he realized Merlin had managed to do what he always did so well and distracted him from the original topic of discussion, "Mordred."

"I don't know if I would call Mordred my friend either," Merlin said honestly, looking down at his hands, "I mean, there's a lot that we have in common... sort of. And he treats me more equally than the other knights, not that any of them are ever cruel to me or anything." He said quickly, knowing full well that Arthur would have stripped them of their title and banished them if they had been overly cruel to him. A year ago, one of the knights had taken issue with the way Merlin interacted with the king. He thought Merlin was out of place and his constant insubordination was something he had to beat out of him. Arthur just happened to be walking through the corridor at the right time and had seen Sir Ballard leaning over Merlin's nearly unconscious body, kicking him repeatedly in the stomach. He had completely lost it and nearly killed the knight on site but instead, he was put in the dungeons and Merlin was taken to Gaius. He had suffered from three broken ribs, a broken wrist and a minor skull fracture. When questioned, Sir Ballard had said he thought he was doing Arthur a favor and teaching his mouthy servant a lesson in respect. Instead of being impressed, Arthur was outraged. He couldn't justify killing the man, although Merlin knew he had wanted to just out of protective instinct but instead, he had stripped him of his knighthood and banished him from Camelot with pain of death upon return. Everyone else was surprised by the severe sentencing, no one in the history of Camelot had ever banished a _knight_ for beating up a _servant_ but Arthur hadn't cared. It was one of the hundreds of reasons Merlin respected him so much. Titles really didn't matter to either of them, at least not when it came to each other.

"He seems to have taken a liking to you though, just like he did when he was a boy." Arthur said, interrupting Merlin's thoughts and Merlin looked up surprised. Arthur had never brought up the fact that they had known Mordred as a boy. The three of them had kept his druid past a secret.

"I suppose," Merlin agreed carefully, "I guess we're closer than I am with the other knights."

"So then what would he want as a reward?"

"All he would want," he said, choosing his words carefully, "is to know that you are safe from harm. Any of your knights would gladly lay down their life for you, but especially Mordred. He owed you a life debt."

"Which he's repaid, three times now," He replied. He reached over the tub and grabbed his towel and stood up. He wrapped the towel around his waist, Merlin averted his eyes respectfully but they wandered back to the king the moment he turned around.

"Well that's all I can think of," He said finally, licking his lips and looking back at the floor as Arthur disappeared behind his changing screen.

"A load of help you are," he complained and threw the towel at Merlin when he emerged wearing his trousers. Merlin ducked and missed the flying towel and stood up. He grabbed Arthur's shirt and walked over to him, slipping the sleeves onto his outstretched arms. He allowed his eyes to take in as much of the other's body as possible without being noticed.

"Sorry."

"Its fine," Arthur waved him off, allowing Merlin to tie the strings together on the neck of his shirt, "I have a council meeting this afternoon after lunch, once you're done polishing the armor you can go for the rest of the day. I want dinner at six though."

"Great," Merlin grinned and sat back down, ready to go back to polishing.

"Merlin," Arthur tilted his head and rested his hands on his hips as he looked at the profoundly dumb servant.

"What?" He asked with that stupid grin and he rolled his eyes.

"My lunch Merlin, that's what!"

"Right!" Merlin grinned and jumped up and raced out of the room.

After bringing Arthur his lunch and polishing his armor, Merlin decided he would go for a nice leisurely walk around the gardens before going home. He knew Gaius would be all too pleased that he had the rest of the day off and would undoubtedly make him do a bunch of house work the moment he saw him. So instead, he wandered around for several hours before finally deciding that his feet needed a break and he headed home. He was right; the moment Merlin walked in, Gaius assigned him several chores around the house. They took up the rest of his afternoon and before he knew it, he was back in the kitchens picking up Arthur's super. As he walked out and headed to the stairs, Gaius stopped him.

"Merlin, after you finish with Arthur's dinner, can you please attend to Sir Mordred? There's an urgent matter I must see to and I don't think I will be back in time." He asked.

Merlin sighed, "of course," he smiled and took the jar of medicine and placed it in his pocket. Gaius thanked him and departed, his brown medicine sack slung over his shoulder. Merlin continued on his way and dropped the dinner off. Arthur was busy going over reports and didn't feel like company so Merlin headed down the hall to the knight's sleeping chambers.

Knocking softly, Merlin waited outside of Mordred's door before he heard the distinct 'come in' call from within.

"Hi," Merlin said as he walked in. Mordred was sitting shirtless on his bed, his legs crossed at the ankles and he set his book down when Merlin came in.

"Ah, Gaius send you to tend to the invalid?" He joked and Merlin smirked.

"Yup," he nodded and walked over to the bed. Mordred tangled his fingers together and rested his hands in his lap as he observed Merlin. Merlin couldn't help his gaze from settling on Mordred's torso. He hoped it looked like he was just looking at the bandage when in reality he was taking in everything that _wasn't_ covered by the bandage.

"Told you I'd show it to you sometime," Mordred said, dragging Merlin from his seriously inappropriate thoughts.

"Hmm?"

"The mark," he said, pointing to the Druid triskele on his left shoulder.

"Oh," Merlin looked at the mark and instantly, the memory of his magic brushing against Mordred's came to mind. "Right, can you sit forward?" He asked, suddenly blushing and extremely nervous which didn't make a lot of sense but he couldn't get over the feeling how intimate the experience had been. It was unlike anything he had ever felt before. As if Mordred had touched the most intimate part of him, which in a way, he had. It had been so brief and yet so intense, an electric sensation that had burned through his entire body filling him with the burning desire to get closer to it.

Mordred leaned forward, his cerulean blue eyes watching Merlin as he continued to turn various shades of red and an amused smile turned his lips. Merlin reached out and began removing the bandage slowly, slender fingers brushing against his cool flesh, creating mountainous regions of goose bumps across the younger man's skin.

"How are you feeling?" Merlin asked, his cloudy eyes looking into Mordred's briefly. If he allowed himself to look any longer, he didn't think he'd ever stop. He could drown in those beautiful, sapphire eyes and completely lose himself.

"Better... a bit bored," he said honestly and Merlin smiled.

"Yea, I've been on bed rest before, really sucks." He agreed and pulled away the final layer of bandage. Blood still coated the white cloth along with the thick greenish grey salve and the anti-septic smell of rosemary filled the room.

"I heard about that. A knight attacked you?" Mordred questioned, tilting his head so he could look down at the gaping wound. Merlin stood up and grabbed the wash basin and a clean cloth and sat back down before answering.

"Yea, and well, couldn't exactly use my magic to defend myself," he replied quietly. It was painful to go back to that memory and whenever he did, he could still feel the ghostly feeling of being kicked in the gut.

"No, I suppose not... I heard what Arthur did though... he's a good man."

"Yes he is," Merlin nodded, "sorry if this hurts," he said before bringing the wet cloth up and began dabbing at the wound. Mordred hissed but drew in a deep breath through clenched teeth. Merlin frowned and tried to be more gently but when Mordred growled for a second time, he used a little bit of magic to send into the wound to take away some of the pain.

"Mmm, that feels good," Mordred sighed, closing his eyes briefly while he basked in the relief from pain. "Thank you."

"My pleasure," he smiled and Mordred smiled back. Merlin bit his lip and pulled out the jar of medicine. He opened it up and stuck his finger into the sticky mess. "Do you want me to heal you a little bit more? Not so much it's noticeable but enough to help speed up the process?" He suddenly asked. He was surprised with how casually he used magic around Mordred but it felt so incredibly natural that it was almost automatic.

"That would be nice," He answered, watching Merlin with hawk like intensity. Merlin nodded and as he began rubbing the mixture over the wound, he began whispering a minor healing spell. As he spoke, his eyes sparked, gold taking over sea blue irises and Mordred gasped in pleasure, allowing his own magic to assist and tangle with Merlin's. Unintentionally, Merlin let out his own quiet moan at the pleasurable sensation and bit his lip. He finished with the salve but he couldn't seem to remove his hand as it slid down from his wound to his bicep.

"Better?"

"Much," Mordred confirmed, his heart pounding heavily in his chest. "Merlin..." He whispered and leaned forward a bit.

"I should finish bandaging this up..." Merlin whispered, his voice becoming thicker with desire the longer his hand remained where it was. His eyes locked on Mordred's chest, too afraid of what would happen if he lifted his gaze.

"Probably," he agreed but he also didn't move his own voice husky and before Merlin could stop himself, he looked up. The look of pure desire in Mordred's eyes caused him to catch his breath, feeling as if he had just been unsuspectingly punched in the gut. His quick eyes took in every feature about Mordred: his dark, nearly black brown hair, the curl that stubbornly stuck out of place over his forehead; his incredible cheekbones and his jaw line that was so enticing and those full, pink lips. He watched as Mordred licked his lips, making them look even sexier and Merlin vaguely wondered if it was possible for his heart to beat right out of his chest. Reluctantly, painfully, Merlin pulled his gaze away and turned away. He grabbed the clean bandages Gaius had left in the room earlier and turned back.

"Here," he whispered and placed the first bandage directly over the wound, "hold this here," he instructed and Mordred lifted his left hand and pressed it over top of Merlin's causing Merlin's stomach to twist. He slowly pulled his hand away, his breathing was becoming irregular and he was nearly gasping as he carefully lifted Mordred's right arm and wrapped the bandage around his torso. Because of the angle, Merlin had to learn forward so much that he was cheek to cheek with Mordred. He could feel the druid's breath on his cheek and he desperately tried to focus on what he was doing. He pinched his lips together and finished tying the bandage and pulled away. Mordred sat perfectly still, watching him with curious eyes and fascination.

"Thank you," he said finally when Merlin couldn't seem to find his voice.

"You're welcome," he said quickly, unable to meet Mordred's gaze which Mordred found to be increasingly adorable.

"Have you had dinner yet?" He asked and Merlin finally managed to look up at him, grey eyes coming to focus on his own.

"Not yet, no."

"Have dinner with me. It's painfully dull sitting here all day, I could use the company." Mordred invited and Merlin nodded.

"Ok, I'll go get your dinner-"

"Don't be ridiculous. George should be just outside the doors, Arthur insisted I have a servant available to me at all times but I'm starting to wonder if he was trying to punish me for something by assigning me George." Mordred joked.

Merlin laughed, "oh George," he chuckled fondly, remembering the humorless servant who took his job all too seriously. "Yea, he's really boring. I love getting him to cover for me when I'm sick, just as an added pain for Arthur." Mordred laughed, his head tilting back and his chest rumbling easily.

"Well just a moment," He managed when their laughing settled, "George!"

At the call of his name, George dutifully stepped into the room, eyes lowered and he bowed low, "yes, Sir Mordred? What can I do for you?" He asked in a rush that made both men giggle.

"Can you please bring two dinners from the kitchen?" He asked and Merlin's head jerked up at Mordred. He was a servant, he wasn't supposed to eat the castle dinners, not like that had stopped him from snacking on Arthur's food in any way but that was Arthur and this was definitely not the same situation.

"Yes, my lord." George said and bowed again, "would you like some wine with that as well?" He asked and Mordred smiled.

"Yes, that'd be lovely thank you." They watched as George bowed again, both fighting against the laughter and barely managing to hold it in until the servant left.

"He bowed three times!" Mordred laughed once the boy was gone and Merlin laughed with him. The previously charged atmosphere between them vanished like the darkness when a fire is lit.

"I don't think I've bowed more than twice to Arthur in the entire time I've known him!" He joked. It was entirely true, considering Merlin never really bowed to anyone and only managed a respectful dip of his head for Arthur.

"Dragons, this is so different," Mordred cursed, shaking his head as his laughter faded.

"I can imagine it's incredibly different." Merlin nodded in understanding.

"The last time I was in Camelot, the knights were trying to kill me," he said, speaking quietly and pointing at the long scar that ran down his left shoulder from where he had been injured as a boy, "and now I am a knight of Camelot." Merlin watched him quietly, looking at the scar and he realized then just how many scars Mordred had. His torso was littered with bumpy white flesh of all different sizes, some long and thin, others short and fat and some curled and circular from burns.

"You've definitely had a different life than most of the knights." He agreed, his hand moving of its own free will and reaching up to trace the scar on his shoulder. At his touch, Mordred jumped slightly; Merlin's fingers were hot against his cool flesh. "I bet you never imagined you would end up here..."

"Not in my wildest fantasies," he confirmed but his tone indicated a second meaning that made Merlin's cheeks heat and there it was again, that undercurrent of desire between them boiling to the surface.

"It goes to show just how different Arthur is from his father," Merlin said, clearing his throat and drawing his hand away, looking back up into Mordred's eyes.

"Like night and day," he agreed and Merlin smiled. There was a soft knock and then George stepped in, skillfully balancing two trays of food, a jug of wine and managing to open the door without dropping anything. If it had been Merlin, the dinners would be splashed across the floor at that point. Merlin automatically jumped up and relieved him of one of the trays and they sat them down on the table. George filled a goblet full of wine and set it on the bedside table for Mordred.

"Would you like me to assist you in eating your dinner?" He asked formally and Mordred smirked.

"No George, that's ok." He assured him.

"Would you like me to pour another goblet of wine sir?" He asked, raising a questioning eyebrow in Merlin's direction.

"Yes, thank you George." Mordred said, his smile growing every second. George poured another goblet and set it beside Mordred's. "That will be all." He told him and George bowed low again. He turned away and shot Merlin the dirtiest of looks he'd seen before slipping from the room. Merlin bit his lip, amusement dancing in his eyes and turned back to Mordred.

"Did you see that look he gave you?" Mordred asked, trying to sit up straighter and Merlin laughed.

"Oh you should see the looks he gives me when I'm with Arthur. I can't tell if he's disgusted with my behaviour or jealous," Merlin laughed as he carried over Mordred's tray of food.

"I think he's jealous," he answered, allowing Merlin to set the tray on his lap carefully.

"Maybe," Merlin shrugged and grabbed the second tray and set it on the night table. "Are you sure you want me to eat with you?" He asked suddenly and Mordred's brow furrowed in confusion.

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Because... well... I'm kind of breaking the law by eating the castle's food." He pointed out but Mordred scoffed.

"Like you've never nicked some of Arthur's food?" He teased and Merlin made a face at him.

"Yea but that's different," He insisted.

"Shut up and eat," Mordred ordered kindly.

"Fine, fine," Merlin smiled and took a bite of the deliciously still warm bread and moaned, "Gaius is not that good of a cook," he told Mordred when he gave him a strange look.

"These cooks are incredible," he agreed, "I remember the first meal I had when I got here. I'd never tasted anything as good as the bread they make." He said as he started eating the steak. He struggled though to cut the meet, since he couldn't move his right arm at all.

"Here, let me," Merlin offered but he shook his head. Speaking a couple words quietly, his sapphire eyes turned gold and his knife began to cut his meat for him. Merlin grinned but cast a weary look over his shoulder. "You should probably be more careful," he warned but Mordred just shrugged and smiled a lazy smile as he chewed the meat.

"George would never barge in here like some," he informed him, making Merlin grin and go back to his own food.

"When I first came to Camelot, it was amazing to me just to have food regularly." Merlin confessed, looking at the generous amount of food on his tray and remember his mother and all the nights he went to bed hungry as a child.

"Same," Mordred agreed, "it isn't easy foraging for food when you're on the run."

"Or when there isn't any food in the village," he added and they looked at each other knowingly.

"How about the beds?" He asked with a grin and Merlin grinned back.

"Yea, having a bed is a luxury that I've really come to enjoy," he agreed.

"Not as comfortable as this one though! I mean, I slept on that bed of yours last night and I think it nearly put my back out." He teased.

"Yea well, not all of us who save Arthur's life get to be knighted," he teased back and Mordred laughed loudly.

"That is pretty rubbish isn't it? I save Arthur's life once and he knights me. You save his life practically daily and here you are, seven years later still his servant." He said as he laughed and Merlin laughed with him. It was either laugh or scream in frustration and since he didn't _really_ mind being Arthur's servant, he decided he'd go with the amusing approach.

"Yea, how did that happen?" He laughed and took a sip of the wine, "I should really stop doing it, clearly it's getting me nowhere."

"Clearly," he smiled and they continued to eat in a slightly uncomfortable silence as the tension between them resurfaced again. Merlin tried to focus all his attention on the food, savoring the delicious taste of the seasoned steak and the creamy, nutty flavor of the whipped squash and potato but his mind wouldn't focus. It had dawned on Merlin that he found men more attractive than women a long time ago and he was no longer bothered by it. At least, not bothered to the point of being thoroughly upset about it. He was aware that it wasn't completely unheard of but that it definitely wasn't something that was acceptable. It was just yet another part of himself that he had to keep hidden and when he was already hiding so many secrets, it was just like all the others. He kept it locked in a secure part of his mind, never looking at it, only acknowledging it when he must but lately, it was getting harder and harder to keep it hidden. He'd always been attracted to Arthur but he was fully aware that _nothing_ would _ever_ happen under any circumstances and though sometimes it pained him or left him feeling slightly uncomfortable below the waist, he wasn't overly bothered by it. But he was bothered by Mordred in more than one way. There was a pull towards the druid that he'd never felt before, some intense force that was pushing Mordred into Merlin's thoughts and life and he didn't know how long he would be able to keep his thoughts to himself.

"So what are you reading?" Merlin asked, unable to take the silence anymore. Under Mordred's intense gaze, he felt like he was either about to burst into flame or his clothes might somehow disappear.

"Hmm? Oh," He looked at the book and shrugged, "just some ridiculous tale about a man who decides he's going to become a knight and goes on these absolutely absurd adventures.[1]"

Merlin leaned across Mordred and picked up the book and looked at the title, _Don Quixote_. "Sounds interesting, I didn't realize you liked to read."

"Who doesn't like to read?" Mordred asked, genuinely surprised. Reading was such a pleasant pass time, one that had helped him through endlessly lonely nights in the wilderness.

"Most people," Merlin replied with a smile and sat the book down, "I always liked stories with magic in them but can't find any of those books here."

"Nope," he agreed sadly, "you know, whenever you want to use magic, you can use it around me. I understand how difficult it can be sometimes, to keep it all inside." Merlin chewed the last bit of his bread as he studied Mordred. Despite everything, there was still a part of him that was hesitant to trust him. It wasn't because of anything Mordred had said or done, just the result of years of paranoia and lying and mistrust.

"Same," he offered and Mordred nodded.

"Thank you. Sometimes I forget that I have magic... you know, when I'm with the others. I almost feel like I belong..." he trailed off, his solemn eyes lowering to his hands as he folded them in his lap.

"You do belong here Mordred," Merlin told him firmly.

"I belong here as much as you belong here," he said seriously, surprising Merlin.

"I..." Merlin opened his mouth but closed it, unable to find the right words. He was destined to be with Arthur, to protect him but could he really tell Mordred that? Could he open up and share with him the burden that destiny had thrust upon him?

"I'm sorry, that wasn't polite," he said before Merlin could gather his thoughts enough to speak, "I just mean that none of us who have magic really belong in Camelot."

"One day it will be safe for us again," he assured him, speaking with that level of conviction that always made Mordred slightly envious. He wished he could feel such conviction about something.

"How can you be so certain? What do you know that makes you speak with the conviction of a prophet?" He asked, his words coming out harsher than he intended.

"I don't know anything, I just believe," Merlin muttered, lowering his gaze before speaking again, "I believe in Arthur and the kingdom he will create."

"Do you know why I agreed to come to Camelot? To be a knight?" He suddenly asked and Merlin shook his head.

"To belong?"

"For you," he answered easily, "because of the faith you have in Arthur. You're Emrys and if you believe that Arthur is the one to free our people, then I'm duty bound to help you in any way that I can." He said, shocking Merlin with his words. Merlin stared at him and he had to tell himself to close his mouth. He could never get used to the fact that there were people out there that served _him_ with the same loyalty that he served Arthur. Alator had sworn his loyalty to him and he wasn't the only sorcerer he had met who knew his true identity and had done the same. It never ceased to amaze him though. He didn't consider himself someone special, anyone of importance. It was all about Arthur and keeping Arthur alive so that Arthur could fulfill his destiny. He just played a minor role and never saw himself with any kind of importance.

"Mordred, Arthur is the important one. You should be here for him, to protect him and make sure he lives so that he can free us." Merlin tried to explain it to Mordred, tried to express how he wasn't at all in any way, important but Mordred just shook his head, eyes alight with a mixture of amusement and intensity.

"I am. I'm here to protect Arthur but only because of you. You're always so busy protecting Arthur you never think twice about yourself but someone needs to look out for you. You may be destined to be the most powerful sorcerer this world has ever seen but you're not invincible. You need people too." He explained just as gently as Merlin had and Merlin felt his heart swell with affection for the other man.

"I don't need anyone looking out for me," he whispered.

"Oh come on Merlin, don't be like that. I know the prophecy, the one that foretells of you're coming and how you will be the one to lead us to our freedom." He said, tired of Merlin's game of cat-and-mouse.

"What?" His head snapped up, looking at Mordred questioningly, "What prophesy? That's ridiculous! It's _Arthur_ who does that!"

"But _you're_ the one who is said to guide the leader of Camelot into the time of Albion. _You're_ the one destined to free the magical people and revive the Old Religion." He insisted and Merlin shook his head, suddenly finding himself becoming angry with Mordred's insistence.

"No!" He yelled, louder than he intended and quickly flushed, "I didn't mean that, I just mean..." he sighed with frustration, "I'm just _one_ of the many people who are meant to help Arthur." Mordred sighed with equal frustration but decided to let the matter drop. Merlin seemed more than ready to accept Arthur's destiny but when it came to his own, he was more than a little recalcitrant.

"I'm sorry," he said gently, raising his eyebrows and giving Merlin a look of submission, "I was only trying to say that you're important to me." He whispered and Merlin bit his lip, embarrassed by his own reaction.

"It's ok, I guess the topic of destiny is a bit of a sensitive subject," he smiled weakly. Mordred reached out and wrapped his hand over Merlin's.

"Then let's talk about other things," he offered and squeezed gently. He left his hand in Merlin's, allowing the other to pull away if he wanted to but Merlin seemed to find that his hand had glued itself to Mordred's and was completely unwilling to let go. "The other night, in the woods for example." He offered up the new topic and Merlin was more than happy to accept this subject.

"That was... incredible." He said, trying to ignore the fact that they were sitting on the bed, holding hands. His mind was racing a thousand miles a minute, trying to analyse what was happening, why Mordred was holding his hand. Was he just being too polite to tell him to let go? Or was he trying to offer him some kind of comfort and if so for what? Or did he simply want to hold his hand? He mentally kicked himself and heard Arthur's voice _don't be such a girl Merlin!_ When he realized he was sitting there, nearly in a panic over _holding a boy's hand_.

"It really was. I've never seen that before, those lights." Mordred added, his thumb starting to rub circles over the back of Merlin's hand.

"I... It was beautiful... I've never had the opportunity to do magic with someone else..." He stammered, his tongue somehow losing the inability to speak as the feeling of Mordred's thumb drew all his focus.

"We should do it again some time."

"I think that would be a little dangerous..." Merlin said, although the idea was incredibly tempting but he could just imagine the look on Gaius' face when he found out. Those eyebrows would get completely lost in his hair they would shoot up so high.

"Ah, perhaps you're right," Mordred sighed and pulled his hand way and Merlin bit his tongue to keep himself from showing any sign of disappointment. Mordred tried lifting his tray to put it on the side table but it was all too awkward and Merlin quickly grabbed it before it tumbled to the floor. He put their trays on the table and sat back down on the side of the bed. "Come on; get comfortable," Mordred said, patting the space to his left, "unless you have somewhere to be."

"No," Merlin cleared his throat and moved to sit beside Mordred, leaning his back against the pile of pillows. "Oh wow, you're right, my bed is a brick compared to this." He murmured quietly, temporarily losing himself in the sheer coziness of the bed. Mordred chuckled and watched him happily, his eyes trailing down Merlin's curved jaw and down his slender neck where he could just see his Adam's apple peeking out from under the neckerchief. Merlin cleared his throat and he realized that he was watching him stare at him.

"It's quite nice isn't it?" He asked with a smile and delighted in the fact that his wandering eyes had caused Merlin to blush.

"Very," he agreed, nodding absently and looking away. He picked at an invisible thread on his pants and Mordred watched. He slipped his fingers over Merlin's, gently caressing the long dexterous fingers, his heart pounded loudly in his chest and he wondered if Merlin would pull away but was overjoyed when he simply opened his hand to him. "Mordred..." he whispered, his head tilting to the side as he watched Mordred's fingers entwine with his own.

"Hmm?" He hummed and looked longingly into Merlin's chalybeous eyes. Merlin chewed his lip, he didn't know what to say but he was pretty sure even if he did, he wouldn't be able to talk. Again, his heart was racing so fast he thought it might burst from his chest but couldn't move, didn't dare move because Mordred's face was getting closer and closer. Was he moving his own head or was Mordred? He couldn't tell and he quickly didn't care because Mordred was pressing velvet lips against his own.

* * *

><p>[1] Referencing Don Quixote, published 1650. I realize that this is <em>after<em> the time that Arthur is theorized to have lived but considering it's a story with dragons in it, I could play with the theoretical timeline a bit :P


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Ok so to compensate for the really long last chapter, here's a shorter one. I am going on a small holiday (sort of), and will hopefully do a LOT more writing in the next couple days. I hope you're enjoying this as much as I am! I had a lot of fun writing these last two chapters and I'm really pleased with how the story is turning out. **

**I should also point out that I have completely figured out ****_where_**** the story is going. I know that was a concern I had when I first started it but I've done a lot of thinking about it and figured out a bunch of things. SO, plot is happening! Although this chapter is really just smut! So enjoy the little bit of smut because it's about to get complicated.**

Chapter Five

Merlin tensed as Mordred's lips pressed against his own but quickly relaxed and moved his lips against his. A moaned was torn from him as Mordred's tongue brushed against Merlin's bottom lip and he reached up, cupping the side of Mordred's face as he opened his mouth. His fingers brushed against the dark stubble that lined his tantalizing jaw.

Mordred could hardly breathe; kissing Merlin was like kissing fire and life itself. He tasted like honey and trees and the Earth and all the wonderful things that were purely _Merlin_. He groaned hungrily and slipped his good arm behind Merlin, pulling him against his body. Flames erupted in his mind, desire burning away any hesitation and the feel of Merlin's lithe body chased away all doubt. Neither of them intended for it to happen but instinctively, their magic flared, lapping against each other's just as their mouths fit together. It heightened all their senses so that every touch sent electric shocks through their nerves, every gasp was like the glorious cry of victory and every taste blossomed on their tongues, creating images and sensations that were completely overwhelming. Like a wandering star, they fell through the depths of desire and only resurfaced when they could no longer go without air.

"Mordred," Merlin gasped, his lips swelling from their stolen kiss. Their breathing came in short, desperate gasps as they sat frozen on the bed. Mordred's hand rubbed gently at Merlin's back and Merlin finally opened his eyes to find Mordred's opalescent eyes staring back at him.

"Hmm?" He asked, his gaze moving back to Merlin's cherry lips.

"What..." He tried to think, tried to form something that resembled a thought but Mordred was so incredibly beautiful and he'd never had an opportunity like this before. Abandoning reason, he took Mordred's bottom lip between his teeth and teasingly tugged and shivered when Mordred growled. He slipped his tongue out to run against his lip, tracing the curve and then sliding it inside to taste every part of him. His neck strained as he tried to get into a better position as they kissed where he could reach more of Mordred and as if he could read his thoughts, Mordred used his good arm to pull Merlin onto his lap. He whimpered when he felt Mordred's hardened cock against his own. Careful to avoid the bandaged wound, he laced both hands through Mordred's hair and gripped tightly, causing another moan to escape from Mordred's lips.

_Merlin_ Mordred's voice echoed through his head and he shook with the intimacy of it. He wanted to feel every single inch of Mordred, every crevice, every muscle, and he wanted Mordred to have every part of him.

_Mordred_ he pleaded and Mordred audibly quivered as his name rolled from Merlin's mind to his own.

_Merlin, we shouldn't... we should stop..._ he tried to say, but his lips were already defying him, his tongue trying to devour Merlin. With his one moveable arm, he snaked it under the back of Merlin's shirt and dragged his nails down the delicate flesh.

_Why?_ He questioned, completely lost in the blaze of desire, all his sensible reactions gone and only reckless abandon in its place remained.

_Because... _He struggled for a good enough reason but the truth was he didn't want this to stop, never wanted it to end. As Merlin pulled his mouth away just enough to bite his lip again, hard enough to draw blood creating a perfect blend of pain and pleasure and before he could protest anymore, Merlin moved his lips down Mordred's jaw, nipping and biting at the flesh. Mordred ran his hand over the muscles in his back, letting his fingers trail down his spine and slip over his pants to grip his arse.

"God Mordred," Merlin moaned, a shiver trailing down his flesh from where Merlin's breath brushed against his neck.

"Shhh, George is just outside..." He warned and trailed his tongue down Merlin's neck. He pulled his neckerchief off in a rush, needing to bury his face in the other's neck too badly.

_Oh god Mordred_ Merlin's voice screamed in his head and Mordred nearly lost it right there, he knew Merlin had done it to drive him wild.

_Screw it_ Mordred thought back, this wasn't exactly how he wanted to do this. He wanted to have Merlin with two good hands, to take his hips in both hands and pull him down onto him. He didn't want to be sitting here, half of his body practically useless and unable to be as rough as the need demanded. But it didn't matter anymore because Merlin was here now, in his lap, grinding his ass against him and practically begging for release. Slender fingers reached between then, grabbing hold of the laces holding Merlin's pants up and began clumsily untying the knots. Realizing what Mordred was doing, Merlin's eager hands slipped to Mordred's trousers and had them unlaced before Mordred had even managed to undo one knot. Merlin relieved him of the difficult task and untied them for him. His breath caught as he realized what he was about to do and he suddenly wasn't entirely sure if he was ready for that. Part of him, at least the part that was currently in control, was more than ready but the quickly becoming dominate part was screaming at him to slow down.

Before Merlin could process what he was feeling though, Mordred's pale hand reached into his trousers and slender fingers wrapped around his length. He gasped and his eyes fluttered closed momentarily at the delightful sensation. Mordred's fingers expertly worked his throbbing cock, his thumb rubbing against the extra sensitive head as the other digits massaged, pulled and rubbed.

_Mordred_ he breathed and slipped his own nimble hand into the other's pants. Gliding his palm over the tip and smearing his pre-come down his length, he wrapped his hand around the hardened piece of flesh and started pumping. Mordred growled deep against Merlin's neck, biting his neck hard just before sucking his milky flesh between his teeth and moaning loudly.

_Merlin_ he groaned and everything was spinning out of control and the only thing holding him to this reality was Merlin. Over and over his name repeated in his mind, repeating it like a chant, _MerlinMerlinMerlinMerlin_.

It was too much, his body was exploding with pleasure and Merlin gasped, "Mordred, I-" he couldn't finish speaking before he was coming hard into Mordred's hand. He continued to pump him, slow, tight pumps that drew every last bit of pleasure out. Seeing Merlin shake and wither over top of him was all it took for Mordred to come. Light and color exploding in his mind as the euphoria of his orgasm filled him completely. They remained like that for several minutes, foreheads pressed against each other's and gasping for breath.

"Mmm... you made a mess of my trousers," Mordred finally said with a chuckle and Merlin laughed.

"Sorry," he whispered and Mordred shook his head. He gripped Merlin's chin and tilted his face to look at him.

"Never apologize for making a mess of my trousers," he smirked and kissed him roughly. Merlin melted into the kiss before sliding down his lap. Mordred raised an elegant brow as he watched Merlin, and he gasped when Merlin's tongue flicked out from his mouth to lick off the come that covered Mordred's stomach. His mouth fell open as he watched, pupils dilated to the point of nearly washing out all the blue as he watched the slender man kneeling over him. He shivered as his warm tongue licked everything up.

"Ok wow..." Mordred finally breathed when Merlin had pulled away and retied his trousers. "That... I was not expecting at all..." He said as he watched Merlin get off the bed and walk over to the water basin. He dipped a cloth in the water and began cleaning his own trousers.

"I wasn't expecting any of that..." Merlin admitted, his ears burning with heat.

"No but it was a very, very pleasant surprise. I'll be sure to tell Gais you took _really_ good care of me." He teased and laughed when Merlin looked at him with a horrified expression. "Relax, I was only kidding."

"K," Merlin let out a shaky breath and bit his lip. He could still taste Mordred on his lips. "Um..." he cleared his throat awkwardly and sat down the cloth. Mordred tilted his head and looked at him questioningly. When Merlin said nothing he simply smiled and held out his left hand, silently inviting him back onto the bed.

"So..." He said once Merlin had settled in beside him, "I have a slightly awkward question." Merlin raised an eyebrow at him.

"What?"

"Are you and Arthur...?" He asked and Merlin pulled away as if he was on fire.

"Me and Arthur?" He asked before roaring with laughter. "Oh god," he laughed and Mordred smiled indulgently at him.

"It's a fair assumption. He hasn't married, never shows any interest in any woman and he banishes his own knights for laying a finger on you and will surrender his entire kingdom to keep you safe." He pointed out and when he said it like that, Merlin did wonder if Arthur held his own feelings for him but he shook the thought away.

"No, Arthur and I have never, ever done anything. I..." He frowned, not sure how to say what he wanted to. "I care about Arthur and... sometimes it seems like our relationship goes beyond friendship and definitely far beyond that of a king and his servant but, no, there's never been anything more." He said firmly, sounding a lot more convinced than he actually felt. He had fallen in love with Arthur several years ago but those feelings were locked away, buried in the back of his mind never to be thought about or felt again.

"Alright," Mordred nodded but he didn't completely believe him. He had seen the way the king had looked at his servant; there was nothing but love in those eyes. "So I get you all to myself then?"

"You want me all to yourself?" Merlin asked, blushing and suddenly feeling like a teenage girl talking to the boy she had a crush on. He mentally scolded himself, again, attempting to reign in his emotions. He had no idea what Mordred's intentions were, what this meant to him, if anything at all and he wasn't about to start acting all love struck.

"I'm pretty possessive," he admitted, leaning in to kiss Merlin's jaw. Merlin smiled and leaned into the kisses.

"Well, I think I can work with that," he said honestly and smiled at the other man.

"Hmm good," Mordred licked his lips, savoring the taste of Merlin before stealing another kiss.

"I should get home though... otherwise Gaius is going to start worrying..." he whispered, reaching up to stroke his cheek and press a handful of fleeting kisses to his silky lips.

"Will you come back and change my dressing in the morning?" He asked as Merlin got up from the bed.

"Probably won't be able to. You know how Arthur is in the morning; I usually don't get five minutes to myself until the afternoon. I doubt that he'll give me time to do any errands for Gaius," said Merlin. He gathered up their food trays purely out of habit and placed the salve back in his slightly dryer pants although he still had to carry the trays in front of him.

"That's too bad," Mordred frowned, "well hopefully I'll get to see you at some point."

"Of course," Merlin nodded and backed away to the door, "goodnight Mordred."

"Oh Merlin," He called, his lustrous voice laced with amusement, "you're forgetting this" he held up his dark blue neckerchief.


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: So this holiday of mine... not really turning into a successful writing holiday lol It's not totally a holiday, I'm just house sitting with a friend but she's at work all day until 6 usually so I was hoping to use that time to write. But nope, barely been able to put out 2000 words a day. So it's taken me all week to write this chapter but oh well. I hope you enjoy it, it's mostly just building the trust relationship between Mordred and Merlin. Next chapter will have awesome action, romantic drama and all that fun stuff! **

**Happy reading! Again, thanks for the reviews and all your support. Please keep reviewing, not because I'm insecure and need your reassurance that I'm not writing total rubbish (ok maybe a little :P ) but because I genuinely want to know what my readers think. I'm not just writing this because I love writing, I'm writing it for all of you too. Your opinions, reactions and thoughts matter a great deal to me. **

Chapter Six

"Merlin, there you are!" Gaius exclaimed when Merlin walked in the door several minutes later looking especially flustered.

"Right sorry Gaius, long day, headed to bed," he said all at once as he walked swiftly through the room.

"Hold it!" Gaius shouted, stopping the young warlock midstride.

"Hmm?" He asked as he turned around and placed his most innocent of smiles on his face.

"What did you do?" He asked, bushy eyebrows furrowing into a knot between his eyes.

"Nothing! Why would you think I've done something? I haven't done anything at all," Merlin said in a rush, mentally kicking himself. Why couldn't he ever just play it cool with Gaius?

"Merlin," He said firmly in the tone that clearly meant he knew Merlin wasn't being completely truthful.

"Honestly Gaius, I haven't done anything wrong," he answered as sincerely as he could. Discussing his love life with anyone, especially Gaius was not something he was at all interested in doing. When the subject of said love life was _Sir Mordred_, knight of Camelot, he was even less eager to discuss it.

"Hmph," Gaius scoffed disbelievingly and turned away from the younger man, "well you missed dinner while you were off doing whatever. Did you tend to Sir Mordred?"

"Sir Mordred?" Merlin bit his tongue, willing the heat to leave his face, "yes, yes I tended to his injury. It looks good, healing nicely but it won't be fully healed for several more weeks."

"Good," he nodded approvingly and held up the plate of food, "super?"

"Ah no thanks," he said politely, "Mordred insisted I eat with him. He was rather bored." He explained.

"Ah, I see," Gaius sat the plate back on the table, "well then, goodnight."

"Night," Merlin waved and quickly stumbled into his bedroom. He needed to think, to process what just happened. He shut the door and threw himself on the bed. Staring up at the ceiling, he let out the breath he had been holding since he left Mordred's room.

As he thought about what happened, his fingers came to his mouth, tracing the ghosts of Mordred's kisses. It hadn't been his first kiss, but it was definitely the first of its kind. He frowned in confusion. For so many years he'd abandoned any hopes of ever being with anyone. His destiny came first, ensuring Arthur's life was all that had mattered for so long and now he wasn't sure if it really was impossible for him to be with someone. Merlin sighed heavily. Regardless of the fact that nothing had ever happened or could ever happen between him and Arthur, he still felt like he had just been unfaithful to him somehow. It was ridiculous really, to feel that way but the gnawing feeling of guilt in his stomach didn't seem to realize that. He was free to kiss whoever he wanted, there was no reason he should feel ashamed.

He decided he would think about it later. He was exhausted and wanted nothing more than to enter the beautiful oblivion of sleep. Putting away all thoughts of Mordred and Arthur, he closed his eyes and deepened his breathing, willing himself to sleep.

He didn't think it worked until Gaius was thumping loudly on the door telling him to get up. Rubbing his eyes, Merlin looked down at himself and realized he was still wearing yesterday's clothes. He pulled off his neckerchief and shirt and reached for a clean one on the floor when he noticed his reflection. On his neck were several dark red and purple love bites and immediately, he blushed at the memory of Mordred's mouth making the marks. He smiled to himself and quickly dressed, tying his red neckerchief around his neck and walking into the other room.

"Morning," he mumbled tiredly to Gaius and sat down at the table. Gaius sat a chunk of bread and an apple in front of him.

"Good morning Merlin," he greeted before sitting down and taking a bite of his own bread. "Will you be able to change Sir Mordred's bandage again this morning? There's been another case of a sweating sickness and I need to see to it."

"Uh no, probably not. I need to go see to Arthur, he's got a council meeting and then he mentioned something about possibly going on a patrol." He answered, although it wasn't entirely truthful but he wasn't ready to face Mordred again so soon.

"Alright," Gaius nodded, disappointment showing in his eyes before he quickly smiled and covered it up.

"I better go," Merlin jumped up. Snatching the apple, he walked out without another word and headed to the kitchens.

"Rise and shine!" He shouted as he came into Arthur's chambers. The king groaned from where he was curled up on the bed and Merlin sat his meal on the table. He walked over to the windows and swiftly pulled the drapes open, "up and at 'em!"

"Go away Merlin," Arthur grumbled and Merlin turned around and placed his hands on his hips. Arthur lay on his stomach, sprawled across the bed. A red pillow was lying over his head, Merlin assumed he'd just placed it there to block out the sudden light and the crimson sheet was wrapped around his hips. Out of habit, he drank in the site of the beautiful man in front of him, his golden skin and the few pale scars from injuries sustained in battle and training that he had long ago memorized. Again, the stabbing sensation of guilt plagued him. He pushed it away in annoyance and grabbed the pillow that covered Arthur's head.

"Arthur," he sighed and Arthur lazily looked up at him, his sky blue eyes hazy with sleep.

"I don't feel well today," he said and immediately, Merlin was checking him for signs of illness. "Merlin!" He growled in annoyance as Merlin's hands were all over his face, checking for a fever, checking his gums and eyes.

"What's wrong? Are you ill? Injured?" He asked worriedly and Arthur wrapped his strong hands around Merlin's wrists.

"No, I'm fine, I'm just tired." He finally answered and Merlin visibly sighed with relief.

"Well I would let you sleep in but you have a council meeting to follow up on yesterday's. You mentioned something about reports of bandits or something?" He asked, not pulling his wrists out of Arthur's vice-like grip.

"Yes, that's right," he sighed loudly and sat up, releasing his servant's fragile limbs. He swung his legs over the edge of the bed and stretched, yawning loudly.

"Did you not sleep well sire?" Merlin asked, turning away, rubbing his wrists affectionately before preparing the king's breakfast for him.

"More like I didn't get to sleep," he answered from just behind him, "I was up all night reading these reports."

"Anything to worry about?" He questioned, attentive eyes searching his friend's worried face.

"It's hard to say. There are several reports of people who are traveling being attacked by the eastern border, all centralizing in one area," he said.

"You think they're trying to keep people away from something?"

"The thought had crossed my mind yea," he bit into a sausage.

"Could it be Morgana?" Merlin bit his lip, he hated mentioning her but she was a threat that still very much existed despite three years of silence.

"There's no way to tell," Arthur simply said, staring across the room but Merlin knew he was wondering the same thing.

"Will we be going out then? To look into it?"

"I'll send a patrol first, see what they can find and then decide from there. Lord Oswald is supposed to be visiting and should be here today or tomorrow. I need to deal with him before I can leave Camelot." He explained and Merlin nodded along, grateful that Arthur was in a good mood despite being so tired.

"Shall I accompany you this morning to the meeting?" He asked as casually as he could. He wanted to know what was going on with these bandits. The very idea that it could be Morgana made his blood turn to ice and his hand shake. For the past three years, he had been just waiting for the witch to show herself, for her to make yet another attack on the kingdom she sought to take. Whenever she came up in meetings, Merlin paid special attention. He had even gone on his own reconnaissance missions despite Gaius' warnings and unknowingly to Arthur but he found nothing. He knew as much as Arthur did: that there were rumors she had been captured and imprisoned at some point but had managed to escape. Since then, there was nothing but silence. No one knew where she was hiding, what she was planning. The last Merlin and Arthur had seen of her was when they had travelled to the Fortress of Ismere to rescue their knights. However, since then she had disappeared yet again escaping their grasp and Merlin had no doubt that she was plotting something.

Arthur looked up at Merlin and shrugged, "might as well." Once he'd finished his breakfast, Merlin helped him dress and they walked to the council chambers together. Merlin asked dozens of questions about the previous reports but Arthur refused to tell him much more than the fact that people were going missing in one area of the woods. He finally gave up when it was clear that Arthur wasn't going to tell him anything and decided to do as his king continuously asked and shut up.

The meeting was horrifically boring as they reviewed tax reports they hadn't managed to go over yesterday. Leon droned on his painfully monotone voice and Merlin struggled to focus. His mind kept wandering to Mordred and what had taken place last night.

"I want a patrol of five knights to go investigate these disappearances," Arthur said snapping Merlin back to reality. He fumbled the cup he was currently pouring water into and it clattered loudly to the floor. Everyone turned to look at the clumsy servant who's ears were redder than a dozen poppies and Arthur flashed him his _I'm going to kill you later_ glare.

"Sorry," he mumbled and quickly retrieved it.

"As I was saying," Arthur continued, sending another death glare to the auf, "I don't want anyone to engage any threats, just simply see if you can find out what's going on." He instructed Leon who had recently been appointed Constable and was second in command of the knights after Arthur. Merlin listened carefully as he poured water into the goblets of those sitting at the round table.

"I will send Sir Aglovale, Caradoc, Daniel, Gaheris and Lionel." He answered easily, listing a group of knights who Merlin had only met on a few occasions. He knew Daniel, he was a friendly enough bloke but the others were not as accepting of his casual personality. All he knew about them was they were all close, much in the way that Gwaine, Percival, Leon, and Elyan were and that they were usually sent out on these kinds of missions. He desperately wanted to go out with them but he knew there was no way he could. It was so irritating at times, to be stuck in the role of a useless servant.

"Excellent. Onto other matters of state, Lord Oswald is reported to be a day's ride from here." Arthur said and set aside several papers. Lord Oswald, from what Merlin could gather, was an older knight who had served with Uther and had been given a large piece of property to see over in his retirement after having his sword arm cut off in battle. The man only visited once or twice a year as he was getting too old to make the long journey across Camelot's land to the castle. He was tedious and Arthur found him incredibly irritating with his frequent requests for more guards and his habit to try and dictate how things should be done. "After he leaves, I will ride out to the eastern border and meet Sir Aglovale and the others." He informed them.

They discussed the next few days, Arthur gave everyone new tasks to oversee and the meeting ended twenty minutes later. Merlin brought Arthur his lunch in the council room and watched him eat. Arthur then kept Merlin so busy with chores he didn't get home until nearly dawn. For the next three days, he kept him busy with chores and errands he didn't have any time to go in and see Mordred again. Between doing his tasks for Arthur, his errands for Gaius and also pumping the knights for any information about the Sir Aglovale's mission, Merlin nearly forgot about what had taken place with Mordred. The more time he spent away from Mordred, the more difficult it became to get the courage to go see him. So instead he spent his days tending to the Lord Oswald and his men, assuring that the old git had everything he needed. He was a miserable sod, who constantly found something to complain about. Of course it annoyed the hell out of Arthur but he was the king and couldn't exactly tell a well respected hero to piss off so instead, he took his annoyance out in his usual way—Merlin. Any time Oswald complained about something, Merlin was summoned and asked to explain the subpar conditions and Merlin would sputter over some made up excuse while sending Arthur glares full of promised revenge. Two days later, Oswald and his company departed.

Merlin collapsed at the dinner table across from Gaius who had been eating his soup rather peacefully.

"Is something the matter?" He asked his dishevelled ward.

"Oswald is finally gone," he said with a dramatic sigh.

"Is that cause for celebration?" He asked, eyes sparkling with amusement. He'd met Oswald several times before and knew how difficult he was.

"Yes," Merlin grinned, "it means we can finally go join Sir Aglovale's company." He said eagerly. He desperately needed to go and investigate the matter for himself.

"I see," he frowned deeply and looked at Merlin worriedly, "I don't suppose you need me to warn you of the possible danger?"

"I know it'll be dangerous."

"Especially if Morgana truly is behind the disappearances."

"I know but that's why we need to go," he urged. "We need to know what she's up to."

"I agree, but be careful Merlin." Gaius pressed and Merlin flashed him his best 'don't worry about me' smile before digging into his soup.

"Will you go tend to Sir Mordred tonight?" Gaius asked once they finished dinner and he was doing the dishes.

"Uh, ok," Merlin nodded, suddenly anxious. He hadn't spoken or seen Mordred in nearly a week and he had no idea how he was going to react. Of course, he had considered reaching out to him telepathically but whenever he had the time, he couldn't figure out what to say. With slightly shaky hands, he took the jar of medicine and clean bandages from Gaius and left their chambers. He walked slowly down the darkening corridor, his footsteps echoing off the stone walls.

When he reached the hallway that led to Mordred's room, he could hear loud laughter and voices drifting up the hall. Feeling slightly relieved at not having to face the druid alone, he quickened his pace. Knocking on the open door, he noticed Mordred sitting up in bed, a group of knights all around him. Gwaine sat beside Mordred, eating an apple with a knife and laughing the loudest, as usual. Percival stood next to Gwaine, strong arms folded across his solid chest and a warm smile in his eyes as he watched Gwaine. Merlin momentarily wondered about their relationship before his attention turned to the others in the room. Leon sat on a chair on the other side of Mordred and Elyan stood at the foot of the bed.

"Merlin," Gwaine said happily when he spotted the servant loitering in the doorway, "come in! We were just about to tell young Mordred here about that time you and Arthur covered yourself in Gaia berries to escape Wilddeoren." He invited and Merlin cautiously stepped into the room.

"Gaius uh, actually sent me to tend to the bandage," he stammered awkwardly and cleared his throat as he held up the bandages.

"Ah, alright, I suppose story time can wait until we get back," Gwaine sighed sadly and swung his feet off the bed.

"Get back? From where?" Mordred asked. He was in a rather foul mood having spent nearly two weeks now in bed and completely useless. People visited him but they told him very little of what was going on, continuously repeating that he needed to rest and not worry about anything else. He was about ready to skewer the next person who told him take it easy and drink some tea. He was so full of tea and soup he was certain his organs were floating inside of him and he was about ready to burst with fluids. Thankfully, he was at least granted the benefit of using his chamber pot alone, at least he still had some scrap of dignity left. Seeing Merlin standing there though left him feeling a lot less dignified and a lot more like an idiot.

"You didn't tell him?" Merlin asked in surprise, turning away from the dark stare of the younger warlock and going to the basin of water.

"No, we didn't get to that yet, someone had to keep interrupting," Leon explained, giving a pointed look in Gwaine's direction. "There have been reports of travellers disappearing along the eastern border and suspected use of magic. Five days ago, the king sent out a group of scouts. We're leaving to meet up with them in the morning," he told Mordred.

"Does he think it might be Morgana?" He asked worriedly, glancing at everyone but his eyes falling on Merlin last.

"It's possible," Leon said quietly, not missing the exchange between Mordred and Merlin for a moment but he said nothing, "but you don't need to worry about it. We'll be back in a few days." Mordred sighed heavily, his plush lips pinching tightly together to form a thin line.

"Alright, I'm sorry to interrupt but I do need to tend to Sir Mordred's wound," Merlin interjected and the others all stood and moved away.

"Right, well, we'll stop by in the morning," he assured Mordred. The other knights shared a pitying look between each other before they walked out of the room and closed the door behind them.

"Well," Mordred said curtly when they had left.

"Shirt off," Merlin instructed quietly and Mordred glared at him before slowly removing his shirt, wincing as the wound folded and stretched with his movements and awkwardly pulled his battered arm through the sleeve.

"So what should we discuss first? The fact that you've been avoiding me or that you're about to run off to possibly face Morgana by yourself?" He challenged angrily and Merlin winced at his words.

"I'm not going to be facing Morgana by myself, we don't even know if she's actually there." He argued as he slowly removed the bandages. "This is looking really good," he said, changing the subject when he saw the wound.

"Yes well, between the three of us I'm pretty sure we've healed it a little too rapidly," he spat.

"Three of us?"

"Yes, you, me and Gaius. Don't tell me you didn't realize that balm was enchanted?" He said, questioning eyebrows rising in surprise.

"No... I didn't," Merlin whispered, blushing slightly and growing more annoyed with Mordred's attitude.

"Oh," Mordred deflated a little at the tone in Merlin's voice. He wondered briefly if Merlin had never kissed anyone before and perhaps that was why he was avoiding him but that seemed ridiculous. Merlin was at least twenty three years old, surely he had some experience, or at least Mordred thought so. "Well, the three of us have all been trying to subtly heal it which is good because it means I can come with you tomorrow."

"Uh no way are you coming with us," Merlin immediately ordered, gently probing the wound and checking the healing scabs and trying very hard to ignore the rest of his body.

"No way in hell am I staying behind!" He countered angrily and Merlin stopped his inspection. Merlin leaned back and allowed his eyes to take in the full view of the wound. It had in fact, healed a lot but there was still practically a hole of six inches over his right pectoral muscle. His bicep also had a large wound three inches long. Both wounds had severely affected the muscle and Gaius had to reconnect some of the muscles through a very risky surgery that didn't guarantee that the muscles would ever regain full mobility. Despite all the magic that they had done, he was in no way prepared to go out and possibly engage in combat and Merlin told him this.

"Merlin don't be ridiculous!" He shouted and Merlin laughed.

"You want to come with us?" He asked with an annoyed smirk, "get up." He ordered and jumped up himself. He walked over to Mordred's armor and pulled out his sword. The heavy weapon was awkward in his hand and no matter how many times Arthur tried to teach Merlin basic combat, he still found it completely foreign in his hand. Mordred obediently stood, his right arm hanging limply at his side while he clenched his fists.

"What are you doing?" He questioned, watching Merlin with narrowed eyes.

"Take it," He instructed and held out the weapon to him. Mordred reached for it with his left hand and Merlin pulled it away, "with your sword arm." Mordred pinched his lips together and held out his right hand. Merlin placed the handle in his palm and he wrapped his fingers around it. He let go of the blade and immediately, Mordred's arm slumped down, the tip of the sword scraping against the stone floor.

"Now slowly raise your hand, arm straight out so it's level with your shoulder." He directed and Mordred glared at him challengingly. He slowly started raising his arm, the pain of the movement clear in his eyes but he refused to back down from this ridiculous challenge. Merlin folded his arms across his chest as he watched, the sword humming as it shook and a thin layer of sweat shimmered on Mordred's forehead. Before he could raise it to his shoulder length, unable to raise it any further, he let out a small cry of pain and the sword clattered ominously to the floor. He stared at the sword, his rage boiling beneath the surface and threatening to come out. His jaw twitched in frustration as he clenched his teeth.

"Mordred," Merlin muttered, eyes full of empathy and he stepped forward, taking the other's hands in his own but he jerked them away.

"Don't!" He barked and looked up at him, fear burning behind the anger.

"Mordred, you need to realize that you might never be able to actually fight again... at least not with your right hand. It's been a week and you've healed remarkably but..." he trialled off, not sure what else to say as the man before him crumbled.

"Heal me," he pleaded, "please Merlin, just heal it."

"You know that I can't do that," He sighed. He could heal him, he could fix all of this but at what cost? Others had seen the injury, sure they didn't fully understand the severity of it but it would still be far too risky.

"You can," he insisted, "no one else but Gaius knows exactly how bad it is, right?"

"Right," he nodded slowly.

"So then what's the problem? Can't you just...heal the worst of it?" He asked weakly and Merlin sat down on the side of the bed.

"I could... try but Mordred, you can't just suddenly be fully recovered! I mean..."

"You need to do something Merlin. I'm a knight of Camelot! I have to be able to fight!" He cried, voice taking on a panicked tone and eyes widening with the sudden fear of not being able to be a knight anymore and what would happen to him if he lost this too?

Merlin looked away, unable to bear looking at the tortured man in front of him any longer. He could hear Gaius in his head, scolding him for even thinking about considering the very idea. On the other hand, this was Mordred. He was one of his own and also one of the two people in the world that Merlin could be himself with and also someone who was proving to be an ally in protecting Arthur against the endless threats. What would happen to him if he was forced to give up active duty as a knight? Merlin knew how desperate Mordred was for purpose and he remembered all too well how that felt. Mordred was in an ideal position to be close enough to Arthur and provide added protection. He was also trained in combat which was something Merlin seriously lacked and he felt like that was something that would be key to Arthur staying alive.

"Ok," he said finally and drew in a deep breath as he looked back up at Mordred, "sit down."

"Thank you Merlin, seriously thank you!" He cried with relief and immediately sank down on the bed, turning his injured side to the powerful sorcerer.

Merlin got up and walked to the door where he pushed the lock into place and then confirmed it was locked by pulling on the door. He turned away and walked back to the bed and stood over Mordred.

"Lay back," he ordered and Mordred obediently laid back on his bed and let out a nervous breath. "I'm going to use my magic to see the full extent of the damage done to your muscles. It'll allow me to determine which spell will be best to use, ok?"

"Ok," Mordred smiled reassuringly at him and Merlin pressed his shaking hand over the wound. Closing his eyes, he allowed his magic to seep through him and into Mordred and followed. He knew what healthy muscles were supposed to look like; he had studied pictures of the human body in Gaius' books, had seen several surgeries and had been studying it all for several years now. He knew what he needed to look for and he found it quickly. Touching the torn muscles with his magic, he slowly inspected it, using the magic to feel it as if he could feel it with his hands. He could feel the part where Gaius had had to sew the muscle back together, could feel the scaring and from there he followed the nerves all the way to his hand. If left as it currently was, Mordred would never regain full mobility of his arm. By the way the nerves would be pinched under the scar tissue, he would most likely experience pain for the rest of his life making sword fighting impossible and possibly even simple tasks like dressing himself could be difficult. The difficultly was that his body had already tried to heal itself, of course it had been helped by Gaius and Merlin and he could feel remnants of Mordred's own magic but in a way, that all made it worse. It would be easier to repair it if it had just happened but now he would need to go and reverse what healing had been done and redo it. It would be excoriating for Mordred and would require the most powerful kind of spell he knew. Slowly, he withdrew himself from Mordred's body, drawing his magic back within himself and opening his eyes.

"This spell that I'm going to do... it's... powerful. It's the most powerful healing spell that I know... perhaps the most powerful in the world." He hesitated, should he tell Mordred where he got it from? Would he question the language it was in? Would he notice that it was in the language of the Dragons? How much could he trust him? Looking down at the younger man, he chewed his lip in debate, struggling with the decision facing him.

"Ok," Mordred gulped, he trusted Merlin completely. There was no doubt in his mind that Merlin could cast this spell.

"The individual who gave me this spell was not exactly happy to give it to me, which means I need you to swear to me, Mordred, you will never try this spell—no matter what." He urged, trying to express just how important this was. If Kilgharrah knew what he was doing, he honestly didn't know what would happen but he knew it wouldn't be good.

"Of course," Mordred frowned at him, "I would never share any spell you use and of course I wouldn't try it—I don't have the power even if I wanted to." He insisted and Merlin nodded.

"Ok, just swear it to me."

"I swear Merlin." He promised sincerely and that seemed to satisfy Merlin.

"Alright. One more thing, this is going to hurt... a lot. It's probably going to be the most painful experience you've ever had. I have to undo all the healing that's already been done which means, I'm going to use magic to reopen the wound. It will rip through skin and muscle, tearing and it will be slower than when it had first happened and you'll be expecting it so it'll be even worse. But no matter what Mordred, you can't scream. If you scream, the guards are going to come in and they're going to see me doing magic on you and they will kill me. This is going to take all of my focus, all of my power and I won't be able to defend myself. Do you understand?" He asked, his young eyes staring intently at the others, and there was none of the familiar light heartedness that Mordred was so used to seeing in them.

"Ok... hand me my belt." He asked, reaching out his hand. Merlin grabbed his belt that hung over the back of one of the chairs and handed it over. He put it in his mouth and nodded when it was in a good place.

"Ok, here it goes..." he cleared his throat and rubbed his hands together. Closing his eyes, he summoned his magic. It came to him like old friends greeting each other, a power that rose from the very depths of the earth and through the stones of the castle and into him. He felt Kilgharrah's presence, his power, his age and the bond that made them kin. He felt the gentle caress of the Earth as her power filled him and his eyes sparked with a golden fire. Mordred stared at him, transfixed by the display of immense power and completely awed and humbled. Merlin placed his hands over Mordred's chest as he focused his magic. Could he control it so it wouldn't heal the outside flesh? He needed to make sure that Mordred still looked slightly injured. The other knights had just seen him earlier tonight, and his miraculous recovery was already going to be questioned but if he suddenly had nothing left but a scar... that would be the end for them both. The effort it was taking to raise the needed amount of power and yet still control it caused a sheen of sweat across his forehead and his mouth to dry. Slowly, deliberately, he opened his mouth and began speaking the words.

"Ic þe þurhhæle þin licsare mid þam sundorcræftas þære ealdaþ æ[1]!" He roared in the thundering voice of a dragon and Mordred bit into the leather, a scream clawing its way out his throat and he clenched his fists as every muscle in his body tensed. The pain was blinding, completely and entirely incomprehensible and he wanted nothing more than to make it step. He wanted to beg, to plead with the gods to make it stop but he couldn't even begin to form the words. He felt every nerve rip, every piece of muscle tear as Merlin ripped through his body like it was butter and he suddenly wondered if he had made a mistaken in trusting Merlin. Just before the blackness took over, he wondered if he would ever wake again.

* * *

><p>[1] Spell is the spell given to Merlin by Kilgharrah in episode 5, series 3, The Crystal Cave<p>


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: Sorry for the extreme delay in posting this chapter! A number of reasons for the delay. I'm hoping to go back to school in January to finish my BA so I've been dealing with student loan bullshit and that's been a pain. I've also needed to finish some knitting projects and I sooooo wish I could write and knit at the same time because that would just be EPIC, I need a stenographer! And then just the usual writer's block. **

**The biggest problem I've encountered now is the love triangle with Arthur, Merlin and Mordred but with some advice from a friend and readers, I think I've found a solution for the problem! I hope you like it. This chapter is ridiculously long, nearly 10 000 words but there was a lot to get in it despite the fact that I feel like nothing happened this chapter lol I'm really not doing a good job of making this sound like a worthy read am I? **

**Thank you for reading and reviewing! Happy reading!**

Chapter Seven

He wasn't sure where he was when he finally came to an hour later. Mordred slowly blinked his eyes open and stared at the stone ceiling in confusion, trying to figure out what happened. Had he fallen asleep? He frowned as he sifted through his last memories. In a flash, it came back to him. Asking Merlin to heal him, begging him to and then the pain. God the pain was so bad; he realized he must have passed out. Nervously, he reached up to touch the wound on his chest, rolling his shoulder to test just how bad it would hurt. He was surprised when there was next to no pain at all and his fingers only ran over a patch of dry scabs.

"How are you feeling?" Merlin asked, startling Mordred fully awake. He was sitting in a chair beside the bed and looked worse than he had ever seen him look before. Dark circles ringed his icy blue eyes making him look even paler than usual and his normally red lips had been drawn into a tight line of pale pink. His black hair stuck out everywhere but matted on his forehead from sweat and he sat, slouched in the chair.

"Uh, ok. How about you? You look terrible..." He said and sat up, using both his arms to push himself up and revelling in having the use of his right arm again.

"Just took a lot out of me," he answered tiredly, watching the other's movements carefully.

"I'd say," he paused and briefly looked away, "thank you Merlin..."

"Does it feel better?"

"Yes, it feels amazing," he answered honestly and lifted his arm and then opened and closed his fist, "it feels like normal now."

"Good," he smiled, truly looking relieved and Mordred held out his hand to him.

"Come here," he invited and before Merlin could protest, he leaned over and pulled the smaller man onto his lap. He wrapped his arms around him and Merlin melted into the embrace. Mordred buried his face in Merlin's neck and drew in a deep breath, memorizing the smell of smoke, dirt and apples that was Merlin.

"You should sleep," he told Merlin, running his fingers through the matted hair and pushing it back off his forehead. Merlin looked up at him with tired eyes and nodded.

"I should go," he agreed but Mordred shook his head.

"Stay here tonight," he whispered, his lips brushing against Merlin's ear.

"Mmm I don't think that would be very wise," he shuddered pleasantly and a small smile tilted his lips up. Mordred's thumb was brushing against those perfect lips before he even realized what he was doing.

"Why? Stay here, I promise I won't try anything," he teased with a wink and Merlin's cheeks flushed an adorable pink. At least there was color in them again, he thought worriedly.

Merlin shifted so that he was sitting comfortably between Mordred's outstretched legs, his back resting against the other man's chest and leaned his head back on his shoulder. He was so exhausted. Using his magic like that had completely drained him. It wasn't that the spell was too complicated but the tentative control he had over it had been the challenging part. He hadn't expected Kilgharrah's resistance either and he had to battle against the dragon's will in order to use it. He was sure the next time he called the Great Dragon he would get an earful about using the spell again. But he had done what he needed to do and he had to admit, he was glad that Mordred would be coming with them on the mission.

"Gaius might come looking for me," he answered finally, revelling in the feel of Mordred's strong arms around him. He briefly wished it was Arthur's but then immediately felt guilty for even having the thought. Arthur wasn't here, Arthur wasn't the one who wanted to hold him, who wanted to kiss him and mark him as his own. Mordred was the one who wanted to do those things and Merlin wanted him to.

"Nah, I'm sure he's gone to bed by now," he insisted further and Merlin was too tired to argue. All he wanted to do was sleep.

"K," he murmured tiredly.

"Here," Mordred pulled the blanket back beside him and carefully moved Merlin onto the empty space beside him. Merlin tucked his arm under the pillow and curled up on his side, his back to the Druid as Mordred tucked him in. He listened as Mordred got up and he could tell he had blown out the candles even from behind his eyelids. He felt the bed shift as he got back in and then wrapped himself around Merlin from behind. His strong arm snaked around his waist and pulled him to his chest and pressed his face against the back of his neck.

"This ok?" He whispered, his breath hot against Merlin's neck and he nodded.

"Yea, it's ok," he whispered, leaning back into the cool warmth that was Mordred. He closed his eyes and allowed himself to relax. He was safe with Mordred and a part of him felt like he would always be safe with him. Despite everything he had with Arthur, Mordred was his own and there was something special about that that couldn't be ignored.

The knock came loudly the following morning, jolting both men out of their deep slumber and Merlin scrambled off the bed in a panic. Waking up in an unfamiliar bed with the alarmingly loud banging had his blood racing and panic rising in his stomach.

"Just a second," He called out as he tripped on the sheet and fell to the floor. Mordred was scrambling awake just as pathetically as Merlin, and he was struggling to pull his shirt back on.

"Hi," Merlin greeted as he wrenched open the door to reveal Sir Leon and Arthur, both looking like they were about ready to break down the door.

"_Mer_lin! What are you doing in here? Why was the door locked?" Arthur shouted, pushing past Merlin and storming into the room. Desperately, he fought to think of a good excuse.

"I wanted privacy when Merlin was dressing my wound last night," Mordred answered for him, voice completely calm as he walked out from behind his changing screen, fully dressed. "And then I was really bored, having had spent so much time just sitting around that I might have insisted that Merlin stay and read to me. He fell asleep and I didn't have the heart to wake him but I completely forgot about the locked door." He explained, spinning the lie with the elegance of a spider.

"I see," Arthur said, his shoulders releasing their tension slowly and he glanced over at Merlin who was now standing between the two men, his hands clasped behind his back.

"Sorry sire," he apologized, "I must have over slept..."He glanced down at the floor, trying with everything in him to keep himself from blushing.

"It's fine," he shrugged it off, not wanting to waste time scolding Merlin; he could do that later. "Go get the horses ready, we're leaving as soon as possible."

"About that my Lord," Mordred said as he stepped forward, "I've been cleared to be able to accompany you, if you'll have me."

"Are you certain?" Leon asked, frowning at Merlin, "you could barely move your arm yesterday."

"Absolutely, I'm healing exceptionally well and Gaius has already given his permission." He lied and Merlin shot him a quick glance. Gaius was so going to kill him.

"Fine," Arthur nodded in agreement, "hurry up, we need to leave right away then." He ordered and Merlin gave Mordred a quick glare before disappearing out the door.

He ran back home, bursting into the door and racing into his room.

"Good heavens Merlin!" Gaius shouted in surprise, dropping the herbs he was holding as his charge startled him.

"Sorry!" He shouted over his shoulder. He grabbed his bag and quickly stuffed a few extra clothes inside it.

"Where were you last night?" Gaius asked as he stopped in the doorway to Merlin's room.

"I fell asleep in Mordred's room. He... he convinced me to heal him a bit more..."

"_Merlin_! Tell me you didn't..." He pleaded in the tone that clearly said he already knew the answer but was desperately hoping he was wrong.

"I did and he's coming with us on the investigation." He told him honestly, there was no point in hiding the truth from him. He finished packing his clothes and pushed past the older man and went into the kitchen where he began packing several bottles of medicinal herbs. He always took some with him on these kinds of trips, he was expected to as the physician's assistant.

"Merlin you idiot!" Gaius exclaimed in annoyance, "how could you be so foolish?!"

"He was never going to regain full function of his arm again Gaius!" He defended his actions despite the feeling that Gaius was right.

"You don't know that!"

"Actually I do but I don't have time to argue with you about this right now. I've over slept and we're leaving right now. I'll explain it to you when I get back," he told him and grabbed half a dozen apples and threw them in his pack except for one which he bit into it. He waved goodbye to a sputtering Gaius and raced down the corridor to the main entrance. The other servants (the ones who were actually good at their jobs) already had the horses saddled and packed and Merlin was eternally grateful. He still didn't have his full strength back and the idea of having to saddle a bunch of horses was exhausting.

Mordred came out of the castle a few minutes later, fully dressed in his armor. His crimson cloak billowed behind him, the wind tossing his black curls and Merlin's stomach flipped as he was struck with the incredible beauty that was Mordred. He was like the apex of a hurricane, the center of a storm and Merlin felt completely out of breath just looking at him. He nearly choked on his apple when Arthur slapped his back.

"Come on Merlin, we don't have all day." Arthur instructed and Merlin managed to get up onto his horse without making a scene.

"Glad to see you're feeling better Sir Mordred!" Sir Elyan greeted the youngest of the knights with a grin as he rode beside him.

"I am too! Gaius is a miracle worker," Mordred said, making a point to turn the attention away from Merlin's assistance and onto the well known healer. No one would question Gaius' ability to heal what had been a nearly fatal wound in such a short time.

"He really is," Sir Leon agreed, eyeing Merlin suspiciously, "I must admit I was rather surprised to see such a drastic change overnight." Merlin looked away from Leon and spurred his horse into a slow trot so that he could catch up and ride beside Arthur.

"Ah, Merlin just has that way with people," Gwaine piped up casually but he was hoping that Leon would let it go. He would never admit to Merlin that he knew his secret; he figured Merlin would tell him when he was ready. So Gwaine played the role of ignorant knight just like the rest of them but was always the first to come up with a way to explain how Merlin couldn't possibly have done anything incredible and thus keeping him out of the spot light he so often thrust himself into. It was truly amazing how powerful and wondrous Merlin was with his magic and yet he could be the stupidest person Gwaine had ever seen before with the way he blatantly preformed magic. Then again, Gwaine was pretty sure that everyone else was equally stupid if not even stupider for not noticing it. He sometimes wondered if everyone knew about his magic and like Gwaine, chose to say nothing but he didn't think they were that good of actors. Leon was definitely suspicious of Merlin at times and Gwaine frequently had to assure Leon that he didn't have magic. The knight often came to Gwaine, asking him about the servant since the two of them seemed friendly and time and time again, he would have to persuade the older knight that Merlin was nothing more than a simple manservant.

Merlin rode up next to Arthur, offering him a kind smile when the king glanced over at him but the smile faded at the dark expression on the other's face.

"Is everything alright?" He asked in a hushed tone, not wanting the other's to hear.

"Everything's fine," he replied in his usual 'I'm not ok but I'm too much of a man to admit I have feelings' way which only made Merlin press harder.

"Arthur about this morning..." Merlin said, having noticed that Arthur's mood had been rather foul since their encounter earlier, "I'm sorry that I over slept and wasn't there to wake you..."

"I don't care about that," He spat in annoyance. It was true, he really didn't care. He had gotten so used to Merlin always being late that it had become a part of his morning routine. He almost always ended up waking up before Merlin actually came in and then would pretend to be sleeping only to give him grief for waking him up and then he would get on him for being late. It was just another one of their rituals they had developed over years of being together. _Together_, he thought. They weren't really together, not in that way anyway but in some ways, they kind of were. If Arthur was being honest with himself, which he tried not to be on most occasions, Merlin was his other half. He cared about Merlin more than he cared about anyone else in his life really and so when Merlin had opened Mordred's bedroom door and revealed he had spent the night, he couldn't help the jealousy that swallowed him whole. He knew he didn't need to be jealous, that not only was Merlin _not_ his, but he had no reason to believe anything was happening between Merlin and the other knight. Still, the feelings of jealousy left a sour taste in his mouth and mood.

"Then... what's the matter?" Merlin asked again and Arthur felt like throttling him. Why couldn't he just leave him alone to sort out his feelings? Because he was Merlin, that's why and he wouldn't love the idiot if he wasn't annoying the hell out of him. He sighed heavily and glanced over his shoulder at his knights who, sensing that the king needed a moment of privacy with his manservant, had all fallen back several paces leaving a good ten foot gap between them.

"Nothing's wrong Merlin, I'm just worried about these disappearances. I'm worried that Morgana is behind them and it'll mean if she's on the move." He confessed. It was true, he was worried about his half sister and he knew Merlin was too and that this was the perfect distraction for him.

"I'm worried too but I know that whatever she throws at us, you'll defeat her." He boldly stated and Arthur shook his head, amazed at Merlin's unfaltering faith in him.

"How can you be so sure?" He asked, glancing over at him anxiously and Merlin met his gaze with his own bright blue eyes and smile.

"Because you're King Arthur. You're the only true king of Camelot, no matter what Morgana believes in her diluted thinking, she could never defeat you." He said it so easily, as if it was as clear as the sky above them and Arthur's heart warmed with gratitude.

"I swear Merlin, sometimes you sound like you're actually wise..." He said in a tone that resembled awe. Merlin scowled at him, pleasantly annoyed with Arthur's inability to see just how smart he actually was but he was quickly humbled as a large overhanging branch caught him across the chest and unsaddled him. He fell to the floor of the forest in a ungraceful heap with a loud "oomph!" and Arthur laughed.

"Forget what I just said," he corrected himself between laughs as Merlin got up and brushed the leaves off himself. He pouted up at Arthur, his ears burning with embarrassment. The king continued to laugh and kicked his horse on. The knights had caught up with them now and they chuckled from their seats as they passed Merlin who was just managing to get back atop his own horse.

"That was really graceful," Gwaine remarked with a teasing wink and Merlin blushed an even darker shade of red. He was too humiliated to notice that Mordred lingered behind the others and was surprised when he found himself riding next to the Druid.

"Here," Mordred leaned over and pulled a leaf from Merlin's hair and smiled, "you ok?"

"Yea, nothing's broken but my pride," he admitted and Mordred smiled kindly at him.

"Ah don't worry about it," he said casually and Merlin smiled in spite of himself. "Is everything ok with you and Arthur?" He asked tentatively. Despite Merlin's insistence that there was nothing going on between the two, Mordred was pretty certain that Arthur at least had feelings for Merlin.

"Yea, everything's fine. He's just worried about Morgana," he said, surprised at how quick he was to tell Mordred this. He normally would just say everything was fine and leave it at that if any of the other knights had asked, but in some way, it felt like Mordred was a part of Merlin's 'inner circle'. Circle was putting it kindly, it was really more of a triangle consisting of Gaius, Kilgharrah and himself. They were the only ones Merlin truly trusted and who knew about his magic. Now Mordred was a part of his life and Merlin was finding it easier and easier to trust him. He smiled to himself. Mordred was his Merlin—he provided him with the same kind of support and unwavering faith that Merlin provided for Arthur.

"What?" Mordred asked catching the amused look at the sorcerer's face.

"Nothing," he said through a grin.

The party rode along the eastern road for the day. They paused only twice to water the horses and to eat a cold lunch and then continued long into the waning evening. Diverging from the road for a half a mile, they stopped and set up camp. Merlin was horrifically exhausted by the time they stopped and every limb hurt. He much preferred to walk long distances than to ride them and his legs ached with camps. Of course, no other servant was ever forced to accompany the knights and so the burdens of caring for everyone and every beast fell to the weary warlock. Stifling a yawn, Merlin took the reins for all the horses in both hands and led them to the side of their camp. He removed their tack while the knights and king made their beds and Leon started a fire. Merlin brushed down the sweaty animals and Arthur, Leon and Elyan left to go see if they could catch any game while they still had a little light. By the time they returned successfully carrying two rabbits, Merlin had finished tending to the horses and was starting on a broth. The last of the fading sun sank below the horizon of trees and the forest was plunged into darkness. The camp fire provided only enough light to make out the faces of the men and barely enough for Merlin to dress the rabbis and cut the fresh meat up into the broth.

"Smells good," Mordred said as he came and took a seat next to Merlin.

"Thanks, it's not ready though," he replied tiredly and stole a glance at the Druid, "how's your shoulder?"

"Alright, thanks to you," he said warmly, the flames of the fire dancing in iridescent eyes.

"I'm glad it's not hurting you. After dinner I'd still like to take a look though." He informed him and he nodded his agreement.

"How about you? You still looked pretty harry this morning after last night, you ok?"

"I'll manage," he answered a little more defensively than he intended but he was so used to people questioning his ability to keep up with the battle trained men that it was second nature to deny any weakness. Besides, he had to be strong and alter for Arthur's sake.

"K," Mordred nodded once, clearly he wasn't convinced but he said nothing. He understood the ned to prove to everyone that he was as good as the rest of them—he was still having to prove it and it was the main reason he was even on this trip. He was the outsider, the boy from an unknown history (unknown to everyone but Arthur and Merlin), and the bandit who had kidnapped the king and then saved his life. He was also the youngest of the knights and of course on his first patrol, he had nearly been killed. If anyone had something to prove it was Mordred.

The rabbit cooked quickly and Merlin served the meaty soup to everyone before grabbing a quick bowl himself. He doled out seconds, scraping the pot clean and Elyane remarked that Merlin would make the perfect wife and then Gwaine commented that he already did—Arthur's wife. They all laughed, used to this kind of banter but Arthur didn't miss the look Merlin exchanged with Mordred.

After doing the dishes, Merlin walked back to the camp and paused. To his right was Arthur and to his left was Mordred. He would normally hunker down beside Arthur, a respectable foot or two away but now there was Mordred. Did whatever relationship he was developing with the latter change his usual camping habits? He decided that it would look too suspect if he suddenly moved closer to Mordred and set up his bedroll in its usual place beside Arthur.

_Goodnight Emyrs_ Mordred whispered inside Merlin's mind and he smiled into his blanket.

_Goodnight Mordred_.

The next morning they woke at sun up and had a small breakfast of bread and cheese, saving their salted pork for lunch. The day went on without incident. The sun grew almost uncomfortably warm by mid afternoon but by the time they stopped for the day, it had cooled to the point that their breaths came out in puffy little clouds.

Merlin prepared another broth, meatless this time and served it with dried biscuits. Again, Mordred bid Merlin a good night despite the fact they hardly talked during the day. It was difficult to have any kind of personal conversation with everyone else around and maintaining a mental conversation was draining for both of them. Besides, the others kept up conversation and pulled Mordred into it frequently and Merlin, despite his friendships with the knights individually, took on the role of the invisible servant when they were all together. Merlin didn't mind anyway, he was too busy keeping an eye out for possible magical dangers.

For the next two days they rode on like this. It rained the third day, putting everyone into a rather foul mood but their spirits brightened when the next day the sun was shining high in a cloudless sky. At evening on the fourth day, Arthur called the party to a halt. As usual, this put everyone on high alter, no more than Merlin who eyed every shadow with suspicion. They were about to dismount when Sir Daniel stepped out of the bushes, his hands raised and a grin plastered across his delicate face.

"Sir Daniel!" Arthur greeted and the others immediately relaxed.

"My lord," Sir Daniel bowed, his fist clasped tightly over his heart, "out camp is just this way," he told them and they all dismounted. Leading their horses by the reins, they stepped off the path and made their way through the thick woods following the crimson cloak ahead of them.

"Sire!" Sir Aglovale greeted excitedly and bowed just before clasping hands with Arthur and then Leon. Merlin inwardly groaned at the task of now having to tend to eleven men all of whom (save for perhaps Mordred), were rather needy. He needed no further instruction from Arthur than being handed his horses reins before going about the task of caring for the horses. He would be sure to keep his ears prickled for any news.

"So what have you discovered?" Arthur immediately asked, wasting no time before getting directly to business, "have you had any trouble?"

"No sire, we did just as you ordered—we've only observed, kept our distance and questioned locals. Everyone is pretty scared and with good reason. A couple of local boys were found murdered not far from a large set of underground caves. We think the people behind the disappearances are hiding out there." He reported, sitting down on the ground across from Arthur who had taken his seat on the fallen log. Merlin wondered if he noticed how the knights who were sitting there before they arrived had all moved so that only the king occupied the fallen tree as if it were his makeshift throne.

"Do you think sorcery is involved?" He asked and Merlin involuntarily tensed at the disapproving tone.

"Aye, definitely. The boys were killed by a sorcerer for sure," Sire Gaheris said, looking at Sir B and Arthur before continuing. "They were struck by something much like Sir Mordred was. I don't know anything else that can do that." He finished and the atmosphere in the camp filled with a tense silence. This changed things for almost everyone. They could fight bandits, murderers, and rebels but not everyone was as confident as Arthur in fighting against sorcery with steel. "Do you think it's her?" Arthur asked finally and Sir B shook his head.

"No, we think it's a group of Druids."

"Druids?" Mordred said before he could stop himself but even Merlin was surprised by this news, "Druids don't murder."

"He's right," Arthur agreed, sending Mordred an understanding look, "the Druids are a peaceful people, they abhor violence. What makes you think they're behind this?" He desperately hoped Sir Aglovale was wrong. He'd granted the Druids safe passage and living in Camelot over a year ago with the understanding that they follow Camelot's laws (which basically meant, at least to Arthur, that he was allowing them to use their magic so long as it hurt no one and he would turn a blind eye). Apparently, not everyone had heard this. If they were killing now it was exactly what Uther had feared and Arthur really didn't want to regret his decision and be proven wrong.

"Well, sorry to say but it's definitely Druids. They've got the caves surrounded by all those superstitious markings," Sir Gaheris said and Mordred frowned. Arthur looked over at him, silently telling him to say nothing but that they would speak in private later.

"What kind of markings?" Arthur asked and he described the talismans that decorated the surrounding woods. "Do you any idea how many there are?" He asked when Sir Gaheris was finished.

"We're not sure, but we're estimating perhaps five or six," Sir Aglovale said.

"So a small group then…" Arthur nodded, "well that's beneficial for us. Tomorrow morning we'll go scout out the area, take a look and see if we can spot anyone coming and going. I don't want to just blunder in there before knowing everything we possibly can." The knights nodded, all agreeing with this plan. Merlin listened from his place at the horses, brushing down the thick coats quietly while he contemplated what he'd just heard.

Druids attacking people? That didn't make any sense, Druids were peaceful people. Despite being terrorised by Uther for twenty five years, they still managed to survive and disagreed with any kind of violence. It was possible that there was a group of Druids who had broken away from their group and had decided that they'd had enough but that was beyond disastrous. Is was people like this that made Merlin want to scream. Here he was, risking his life trying to prove to Arthur that sorcery wasn't something to fear, that it was just like a sword: you could use it to defend the people you care about, for protection and safety or you could use it as a weapon to kill and destroy. It was beyond frustrating though to have people constantly threatening his work. It didn't mean he didn't understand their reasons for striking back. In truth, he completely understood and agreed with all of them, even Morgana but he disagreed about their methods and their intent on hurting Arthur. It was especially unfair of them to punish Arthur for the sins of his father. It was true, Arthur had in fact carried out Uther's wishes and had led raids against Druid camps before but you can't blame someone when they knew no other way. Before Merlin, Arthur was completely ignorant of the effects of his actions, he followed his father blindly and without question not because he agreed but because he truly didn't believe there was any other way. It had taken Merlin years to open up Arthur's eyes and still, Arthur had a long way to go before he would be willing to lift the ban on sorcery.

"Mordred, walk with me," Arthur said as he stood up a few minutes later. The knights were putting together a makeshift dinner and it was the perfect opportunity to speak with the Druid alone. Mordred said nothing but obediently got to his feet and followed Arthur away from the others.

"Is there something I can do for you my lord?" He asked when they were out of ear shot. Arthur reached out and inspected some marks on the bark of a tree to look busy while they spoke.

"Do you think it could be druids?" He asked, glancing at the younger man with a worried expression. Mordred kept his face blank of emotion, revealing nothing of his own feelings on the matter.

"Yes, there are definitely druids staying in the caves. Those talismans Gaheris described sound like ones my father used to set up around our camp to warn us if people were near. They were enchanted so that the moment someone crossed the boundary, it would sound a kind of alarm in the camp and provide us with enough time to escape. It tells you the direction the people are coming from so if you place them all around your camp and they all go off, you know you're surrounded. They're incredible useful. There were a couple others too that I think might be dangerous, magical traps of sorts but I would need to see them to know for sure." He answered honestly, holding nothing back of his past and his face showed nothing but inwardly, his heart raced with fear at revealing so much. Who were these druids? There weren't many who knew these spells, did he know the ones who were hiding here? What would he do if he had to face them? Could he bring himself to kill not only someone of his own kind, but someone he knew from his past? Someone who had kept him safe after his father's death?

"Thank you Mordred," Arthur's expression darkened even more as Mordred spoke and his face was pulled into a tight expression of concern. "I would like to try to reason with them... I don't want to have to kill anyone. I'm hoping that maybe we can speak with them first... arrest those responsible for the crimes but I really would like to avoid a battle." He said truthfully and Mordred smiled at his king's sense of honor. This was why Mordred respected Arthur. He always tried to reason before fighting, always tried to negotiate and find a solution that benefited everyone. He was so unlike his father who would kill first and ask question never. However, Mordred was certain that if these people had abandoned their beliefs as druids for one of violence then there would be no reasoning with them.

"I think that's very honorable of you and I can only hope that they will be willing to listen," he said, lowering his gaze. Arthur gripped his shoulder gently and smiled a sad smile before nodding and walking back to the camp.

_Is everything ok?_ Merlin's voice immediately asked when Arthur left and Mordred looked for the servant. He spotted him by the fire, crouched down and dropping herbs into the pot and not looking at him. He wanted nothing more than to grab Merlin and run. Together, they could handle these people. It would be safer for the two of them than for the knights. How were they to protect Arthur against magic when they couldn't use their own?

_He wanted to know more about the talismans_, he explained and then went on to tell him everything he had told their king.

_Thank you, I-_

"Merlin! Hurry up with that food, I'm starving!" Arthur shouted, playfully kicking Merlin's hip from his perch on the log and earning a devilish glare.

"Sorry sire," he mumbled with a roll of his eyes.

_Sometimes I'm amazed you haven't murdered him in his sleep_ Mordred joked and Merlin stifled a laugh.

_Believe me, I've wanted to sometimes_, he remarked before leaning back. The broth was ready to be heated and he carefully set the pot down in the coals and covered the lid. Standing up, he caught Mordred's eye before walking over to the horses. Moments later, Mordred sauntered over and stood behind him, their backs to each other as they each pet a horse.

"I don't know what I'm going to do if I know them," he whispered fearfully and Merlin's stomach clenched. He wasn't sure what to say so he remained silent, sending a small tendril of magic to wrap around Mordred in a magical embrace. He heard Mordred's sigh and felt him lean into it. "It's going to be very dangerous for everyone. Nothing is more dangerous than a group of sorcerers who have abandoned all reason for revenge," he said, his voice hushed so it wouldn't be overheard.

"No, there really isn't," Merlin agreed quietly thinking of Morgana and all the other dangerous foes he'd faced. They weren't so dangerous because of their magic but because of the hate and thirst for revenge that drove them.

"You'll be careful?"

"Of course," he smiled and glanced over at him over his shoulder, "but I'll do whatever it takes to protect Arthur."

"Agreed," he nodded, "I should go join the others." He grabbed Merlin's hand and gave it a quick squeeze before walking back to the fire and sitting down beside Gwaine.

The rest of the night went by quickly. The knights were all in a light hearted mood, happy to be reunited with the patrol and shared hunting stories. Everyone seemed happy and unconcerned except for Arthur and Merlin who sat on opposite sides of the camp mirroring each other's expressions of worry and doubt.

In the morning, Arthur woke before anyone else. Unable to sleep any longer, he got up and silently left the camp, grabbing his sword and cloak before slipping into the woods. He walked the short distance to the creak he knew wasn't far and set his sword and cloak down.

He crouched at the stream, washing his hands in the cool water that trickled over the rocks and splashed the water over his face. Everything froze though as he felt the cold tip of a sword press against his throat, his hand instantly going to his waist where his sword normally would be but he had set it down a few feet away to wash up. He didn't look up at his attacker, his mind raced with possibilities, his body rigid and as still as the ground under his feet.

"Well what have I here," came the sudden, vaguely familiar voice, "The king of Camelot on his knees," he continued and Arthur broke out into a grin and spun around. The sword was immediately pulled away and driven into its sheath.

"Aaron!" Arthur shouted joyously and pulled the man into his arms.

"It's good to see you Arthur," he said equally happy as he patted the other man's back. Arthur pulled away and held him out at arm's length, bright blue eyes taking in the familiar green eyes and the drastically different face.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, releasing Aaron and placing his hands on his hips, "I haven't received any word from Brittany that you would be traveling through my land." He questioned seriously, eyes narrowing suspiciously but Aaron simply rolled his eyes and grinned at the king.

"Pfft, I don't think I need your permission to walk around these woods! Who do you think you are? The king?" He joked and Arthur laughed, shoving him playfully on the shoulder.

"Sire..." Leon's hesitant voice interrupted and the two men separated and looked at the intruder. Leon's hand rested on the hilt of his sword, ready to be drawn if this man showed any signs of a threat but when he turned, he recognized him immediately. "Prince Aaron!" He exclaimed excitedly and quickly bowed.

"Sir Leon!" He grinned and quickly shook hands with the knight, "good to see you old mate," he said happily and Leon beamed.

Prince Aaron was the son of King Lawrence of Brittany, a small but wealthy kingdom just south east of the lands of Essetir. Uther and Lawrence had created an alliance before Arthur had been born and though it was a strong alliance, the two kingdoms rarely interacted with each other. Lawrence didn't share Uther's hatred of magic, though he did agree that magic was being abused before the Great Purge and had assisted Uther in creating a magic free Camelot. Since then, the two kings had been close friends, frequently writing and every few years, King Lawrence, his wife and son would come and visit. However, since Uther's death, Arthur hadn't heard much from Brittany except that they continued to keep their alliance.

Whenever Aaron did visit, he and Arthur were inseparable. The two had first met as young children, quickly becoming friends. Aaron was brazen and unafraid to voice his opinions, even as a child. He was outspoken, brave, and fearless and also incredibly entertaining. He shared Arthur's sense of humor and the hell the two of them had rained down on Morgana had nearly landed them in the stocks over the years. He was a friendly man who shared Arthur's code of honor and believed in the freedom of all peoples, regardless of wealth, status, race or beliefs. With all of these things in common, it was clear to everyone around them why they had been so close. Unfortunately, they hadn't seen each other in nearly eight years.

"Come," Arthur said, gripping Aaron's shoulder and grabbing his own sword, "have breakfast with us and share our camp tonight." He invited and Aaron grinned.

"Sounds great," He said with a suggestive wink and Arthur's brow twitched curiously.

"Where are your men? I'll show them where we're set up," Leon offered.

"Sir Marcelas and Sir Francis are across the stream a hundred yards." He said with a lazy grin and both Arthur and Leon paused in their tracks.

"You're out here with just _two_ knights?" Arthur nearly shouted in horror, "I know you're good at staying hidden in the woods Aaron but seriously! Haven't you heard the reports about people going missing in this area?"

"As a matter of fact, I have," he grinned back, forest green eyes sparkling with amusement. "I'll explain it later, but first, I'm starving and you distracted me from my fishing." He teased and shaking his head, Arthur led them back to their camp while Leon headed in the opposite direction to get the other knights.

The knights were all waking up slowly, some were wide awake and Merlin was restarting the fire to make a hot breakfast. When those who knew the prince saw the two of them come out of the surrounding bush, they quickly bowed and happily greeted him. Arthur was quick to make introductions of his knights, proud of the men he had chosen.

"And this is Merlin, my manservant," he said finally, grabbing Merlin by the scruff of his neck and pulling him into the circle. Merlin withered under the tight grip and slipped out of it, handing Arthur his bowl of porridge.

"Pleasure to meet you my lord," he said politely but true to form, he kept his gaze locked on the other's and Aaron's grin slowly grew until it resembled Merlin's own goofy grin.

"I like him," he announced, looking at Arthur and back at Merlin, "tell me Merlin, what is it like serving this idiot king?" He asked, clearly baiting the younger man. With a quick glance at the amused if not slightly annoyed look on Arthur's face, he decided there was no need to be delicate.

"He's a complete idiot, totally rubbish, can't even tie his own boots." He said seriously, folding his arms across his chest, "also he's an arrogant prat."

Aaron threw his head back and roared with laughter. The delightful sound filled the woods and was joined with the knight's laugh.

"I've been telling him for years he's a fopdoodle but he just won't listen," he laughed and Merlin grinned at the word.

"Fopdoodle, is that like dollophead?" He asked, goofy grin plastered across his face and Arthur rolled his eyes.

"Bloody hell," he muttered and walked away which made the two laugh even louder.

"What does dollophead mean?"

"In two words? King Arthur," Merlin answered and Aaron grinned.

"Oh, must be a synonym for fopdoodle because that's exactly what it means!" He said just as seriously, his tone dripping with sarcasm and Merlin decided he liked this guy. Leon reappeared moments later with two knights dressed in casual brown clothes and forest green cloaks. They quietly took their seats behind Aaron.

"So Aaron, tell me what the devil you're doing out here with two knights?" Arthur said when Merlin and Aaron sat down on a fallen log across from him. Seeing the two of them sitting side by side, he was struck with the realization of how much Merlin looked like Aaron, only goofier. Aaron had straight black hair, a lot like Merlin's in cut and unruliness but it was slightly lighter with a bit of a brown tinge to it. He was pale like Merlin though, his creamy skin visible beneath the dark stubble lining his jaw and he was lanky like Merlin. Despite the fact that he was Arthur's equal in fighting, well, perhaps not equal but he was definitely _almost_ as good as him, he was ridiculously thin. Unlike Arthur who was thick and bulky with muscle, Aaron was slender with muscles that coiled beneath his skin and upon analysis; Arthur realized he reminded him of a slightly thinner Gwaine in body. It was a strange to see him now, after all these years. He had changed so little and yet he looked much older but Arthur figured the same could be said about himself. They had both grown up a lot in the past eight years.

"I came to see you of course!" He said, a sloppy grin turning his lips, "Seriously, I haven't seen you in years and I thought I would surprise you. I heard about the disappearances though and I asked my father to look into it but of course, he declined. It isn't his land so of course, he wasn't willing to send anyone out to investigate."

"So naturally you decided to come out here by yourself and investigate?" Arthur challenged and Aaron nodded, appearing completely unruffled by this clear act of rebellion. It was typical Aaron. If he believed strongly in something, there was nothing that would stop him from doing what he believed to be right and Arthur thoroughly admired this quality.

"Of course," he said, thanking Merlin for the bowl of porridge and diving into it, "mmm! Merlin, you're a fantastic cook!" He complimented loudly, making Merlin beam with pride.

"Thanks," he muttered embarrassed before disappearing to tend to the horses.

"Does your father know you're here?" He asked, drawing the Prince's attention back to their conversation. Something dark crossed Aaron's face, his eyes taking on a slightly haunted look before he nodded.

"Sure," he lied and Arthur narrowed his gaze.

"Aaron..."

"Alright, he doesn't know but I'm sure he'll figure it out soon." He said with a cheeky grin, "so what are you doing about the disappearances?" He asked, immediately turning the subject and Arthur made a mental note to find out what he was hiding later. For now, there were more important things to deal with than whatever drama Aaron was dealing with in his life.

"We're about to go take a look at the place we think criminals are hiding out," he explained, "just eating and then we'll be heading out. You feel like scouting with us? You could probably show my men a few things about stealth in the forest."

"Ha, probably," Aaron grinned and winked at Leon who knew that when Aaron was in the forest, he could be invisible if he wanted to. He was the by far the best hunter and tracker Leon had ever met. "Sounds fun though, how many do you think there are?"

"We're estimating five sorcerers." Arthur informed him and Aaron nodded, his smile fading.

"Right, so is everyone coming?"

"No," at this Arthur's knights all looked up from their meal, frowns of protest etching their features but he ignored them, "I'll be taking a handful of my men and you and your knights can come with us."

"Sounds like a party," he grinned.

They finished eating, Arthur and Aaron chatting casually and Merlin busied himself with making sure everyone was fed. He barely managed to eat an apple before having to make more porridge and serve it.

"Alright, Sir Aglovale, Leon, Percival, Gwaine, Mordred, Elyan, and Merlin will come with us. I want the rest of you to stay here but be on alert. If things go badly, I want to draw them here and away from their camp understood?" Arthur ordered and Merlin noticed the look of disappointed on the knights faces of those who wouldn't be going with them.

"You're bringing Merlin?" Aaron asked, his brows brought together in confusion, "is he a good fighter?" He looked over at the lanky manservant and Merlin tried not to glare at him, he had every right to wonder why the king was bringing Merlin on a dangerous mission.

"Merlin? No," Arthur snorted and Merlin resisted the urge to punch him, "he's useful though. Not only is he a Gaius' assistant but he also knows a lot about magical lure and there are talismans that he might recognize." He answered and Merlin was surprised by Arthur's sincerity. He wondered if that really was why Arthur insisted on taking him everywhere or if it was for another reason but either way, he wasn't about to complain. At least this way he would be able to keep an eye on the prat.

They set out ten minutes later, Sir Aglovale leading the way. Merlin stayed beside Arthur who followed behind Aglovale and the others behind them. Aaron watched the interactions between Merlin and Arthur with keen interest. They walked for an hour before Aglovale held up his fist bringing them to a halt.

"The first talisman is just a few feet up ahead," he said pointing to a bunch of sticks tied together hanging from a rope. Merlin tilted his head as he looked at it, the light catching it and he noticed a shimmering over the area in front of them.

"Right ok, Mordred?" Arthur called quietly and Mordred quickly came to the front of the party.

"Yes my lord?" He asked, glancing at Merlin briefly before looking back at Arthur. Arthur pulled him a little away from the others and pointed to the talisman.

"Have you seen something like that before?" He asked, if anyone wondered why he was seeking Mordred's knowledge on this subject he planned to just say that Mordred might have come across it in his travels.

"Yes," He nodded, "it's a protective charm and that one," he pointed past the first one they saw to another one they hadn't noticed that looked like a dream catcher hanging from a high branch, "that's a trap. It's a paralysis charm; whoever goes in within its boundary will find themselves unable to move." He explained, his stomach twisting in fear as he tried desperately to keep his face calm. He knew these markings, this magic and a part of him was screaming to make them all turn away. He couldn't do this, he couldn't face her and be expected to kill.

"Right, and if we cross this one they'll know we're coming?" He questioned and Mordred nodded, "and I take it that they surround the entire area?" Aglovale nodded and Arthur sighed, "right ok well then, we need to surround them. We can't let them escape so Gwaine, Percival and Elyan, go to the left and spread out until you come to the south side. Leon, Merlin, Mordred and I will go the other way. Aaron you and your men stay here. When you're in position, use the sparrow call to signal you're ready." He ordered and everyone immediately headed off in their directions. Merlin bit his lip as he tried to walk as quietly as possible but he could feel Mordred's anxiety rushing off of him in psychic waves and he kept being distracted by it.

"Merlin shh!" Arthur growled and Merlin winced.

"Sorry," he whispered and Arthur rolled his eyes. They crept forward, everyone moved silently except the few sticks Merlin stepped on and snapped earning him an annoyed 'hush' from Arthur. When they came across another marker, Arthur instructed Leon to stay and they continued forward.

_Emyrs _Mordred called and Merlin's head snapped behind him to glance at Mordred.

_What?_

_Can you un-enchant the charms?_ He asked and Merlin frowned.

_I don't know, I'll see what I can do_, he answered. As he reached for his magic, his pace slowed ever so slightly and his eyes began to glow. He kept his face turned down and away from Arthur, pretending to be studying every step carefully while he brushed against the magic of the charm. Instantly, he felt the flare of the other's magic against his own and knew that there would be no way to break the spell without altering the person who cast it.

_If I do it, they'll know that we're here anyway. It'd better I didn't do it then, that way they don't know that there's someone with magic coming_. He explained to Mordred who agreed with him. It would be too risky to reveal the fact that there was someone with magic approaching. No, it would be much better if they knew nothing about it at all.

They came to another charm and Mordred was instructed to stay there while Merlin and Arthur went to find the next one. They found it not too far away and could see Percival in the distance on the other side of them. Moments later, they heard several sparrow calls and Arthur pinched his lips together.

"Stay behind me Merlin," he instructed as they stepped forward, breaking the magical barrier. There was no sounding alarm but Merlin knew whoever had cast the charm was fully aware of their presence now.

What happened next was a blur. They had walked for only a few more paces before a blast of fire blew past them, nearly taking out Arthur if Merlin hadn't grabbed him and pulled him behind a tree. Panic and chaos erupted in the still forest, sending birds and critters scattering away as several sorcerers appeared out of nowhere, attacking. Arthur pushed Merlin safely out of the way as he charged forward, no longer concerned with talking peacefully but only thinking of one thing: protect his knights, protect Merlin against this threat. He skillfully dodged another fireball attack and swung his sword, swiftly plunging it into the sorcerer's stomach.

Percival raced forward, his head lowered as he charged like a bull at a man who currently held Gwaine in the air with his magic. He ran straight into the man, knocking him several feet over and to the ground before bringing his sword down across the man's neck. He barely registered the distinctive snap of the metal cutting through bone before going to Gwaine's side to ensure he was alright. Elyan and Leon struggled against another sorcerer. Elyan sought to get his attention, drawing the deadly blasts of magic while Leon attempted to get close enough to kill him.

Merlin stayed in his hiding place, watching the battle enfold. Despite all of their skills, they were no real match for these druids and Merlin could tell he would be tending to a lot of broken ribs and wounds later. He kept his eye on Arthur who was currently in a sword fight with one of the men. Aaron's knights were nearly being torn apart by vines that had been brought to life with magic and wrapped around their limbs, pulling. Aaron and Mordred hacked away at the vegetation, breaking snare only to have another vine replace it. Merlin quickly sought the sorcerer behind this particular magic and spotted her hiding in some bushes near the caves. Raising his hand and keeping himself hidden, he whispered a spell that caused fire to erupt in front of her, breaking her concentration and causing the knights to fall free of the trees. He heard her scream before spotting her running through the trees, abandoning the others. Merlin raced after her, the others could handle the two remaining sorcerers but this girl was powerful and he didn't want to risk Arthur's life. Mordred spotted the mass of long brown hair disappearing behind the trees followed quickly by Merlin and tore after them.

"Merlin!" He shouted, sprinting through the trees with grace. He could see Merlin's brown coat ahead of him and he pushed himself harder. He heard Merlin shout a spell and then a girl's scream that was painfully familiar. He caught up to Merlin seconds later, nearly running into the warlock and his sword fell from his hand.

"Kara?"


End file.
